the coffee girl

Chapter 6

*a month later*

Niall's POV

"Niall?!"

I rolled over in my bed as Harry called out my name, only to fall onto the floor.

"Fuck." I mumbled.

"Niall!"

I groaned, "What?!"

"Get out here!"

I stood and walked out to the living room. I'd taken Lou's advice and moved across the house from Belle. It was definitely different, but she's at least sleeping through the night now which gave me more sleep.

"What?" I mumbled as I plopped down on the couch.

Liam, Louis and Harry sat on the other couch. Belle was laying across Liam's lap.

"Niall," Louis started, "We're concerned. You've been sleeping a lot lately and we've been taking care of Belle a lot more. What is going on?"

I shook my head, "Nothing. But in my defense; you lot roll in every morning at the same time and automatically go to Belle's room. I wake up to get her but when I hear you guys in there, I roll over and go back to sleep."

"Why are you always sleeping though?" Liam asked. "You're tired all the time."

"It's nothing you guys. It's great that you're concerned, but its really nothing." I said quietly.

They nodded and dropped the subject as I got up and went to the kitchen. I made a bottle for Belle and gave it to Liam who gave me a concerned look.

As I went back to the kitchen, I felt a little guilty. Of course I lied to them. I didn't want them to know that since Belle was in the hospital, my depression had gotten worse. Liam was right, I'm always tired and I'd rather spend my time in my room, alone. Sometimes when Belle is ready for naptime I just take her to my room with enough to get us by for a few hours and we hang out there. I'm not suicidal, but it's not like I haven't thought about it; I just won't ever do that.

There's another reason I'm like this and it's because of a voicemail left on my cell phone the day after Belle got home from the hospital.

Hi Niall. It's Kat. I'm sorry I haven't called you. I've been thinking a lot about this and I'm just not sure this is what I want. I loved the time we spent together, but I don't think I'm the girl for you. I'm too much of a free spirit for a famous and single twenty-two year old father. I'm not ready to give up my life and settle down. Please don't come find me. When I return to London I will repay you for the cellphone but I'm hoping you'll keep it turned on. Please just let me go. Bye.

It was like getting my heart ripped out of my chest again. I was angry for days. I didn't let the lads come over anymore. Instead, I paid for them to use our old studio space for a week. I finally let them come back around because we had to get ready for the tour coming up soon. That was the only reason; that, and because I couldn't take care of Belle by myself. They help a lot, I just wish I was strong enough to do it all by myself.

Kat's POV

It's been a month and he's all I think about. I've been keeping up with his life over Twitter. He's constantly posting pictures of Belle now that she's not a secret anymore. I feel bad for leaving him without a proper goodbye, but I'm not ready to be with someone yet. I like being free and independent. I know he never said it, but I think he really wants me around long term. That would mean becoming a mother figure to Belle. I'm definitely not ready for that.

When my plane landed at Heathrow, I was the first one off. I had called Amy yesterday to ask if she was still at the apartment. She had told me she was and that my old room was still empty. I got my bags from the baggage claim and headed out to the taxi stand.