Crush - Leah Williamson

14. Closer

Closer - Tegan and Sara

"So let's make things physical
I won't treat you like you're oh so typical.
All you think of lately is getting underneath me
All I dream of lately is how to get you underneath me"
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Exhilaration.

That's the feeling the match against Levante left me with. And one I would forever seek, for it ignited my body.

A fever, of some sorts.

Some players get the privilege of feeling it when they win a trophy, an award. For me it was a reward of having exhausted every part of myself to conquer a specific goal.

My debut was one of its kind. Scoring twenty minutes after coming on for the first time was such an accelerating feeling I think I will rumble about it until I die. Many times since then I thought if something could top it and instead of feeling disappointed for the possibility of never happening, a fire lit inside my body

Maybe Alexia did raise me well

It was because of this need of relive this feeling again that I tired myself out on every training, giving until the last breath I had on my overworked body, just so I could make the starting XI. A new goal, step by step

I think I ate, slept, showered, thinking of the moment when Jona announced it. I am young, in need of some minutes to shape me into the 'next best thing' (DAZN's last front page) so I assumed it would take me at least half a season on the team before I got to start.

I'm like Vicky Lopez, the seventeen year old that has already started on a UWCL fixture. Just six years older

However she's been at the club way longer than I've been and knows exactly how Barcelona plays. For those reasons I thought my first starting would have to wait until we played some team from the bottom of the table

So imagine how my eyebrows reached my hairline, my mouth touched the dirty locker room floor and my eyes left their sockets when Jona announced the starting XI for the fourth game of the season

Against Real Madrid

"Escuchen, escuchen. Diré la alineación para el sábado. Cata on goal. Mapi, Irene, Rölfo and Batlle. Then Kiera, Aitana and Patri on midfield. I know you want to play in your position Ale, but I truly think you'll excel as a false nine. Which is why you'll play there on this match too, accompanied by Caro and, for the first time, Taylor."

My gasp was heard across the room when my name fell out of his lips. He stiffed a laugh trying to maintain his composed face

"We are beyond satisfied with your performance, on trainings and on last match. I think playing your first El Clásico as a starter will boost you up in every single way. Professionally and personally."

I was too stunned to speak, even when everyone's eyes were focused on me awaiting some sort of reaction. It seems just sitting frozen on my spot wasn't as entertaining as they thought

"Besides, the fervent passion you showed on the weekend is exactly what this match needs. So congratulations Ona. We are leaving tomorrow morning, everyone has to be here at nine AM. Our train leaves at ten, please don't be late. Nos vemos."

With the room full of applauses and praising yells on my direction, Jona left smiling widely. I swear that little man will give me a heart attack someday.

Alexia had immediately come to my rescue before all the pats on my back suffocated me. My teammates were the most comprehensive and affectionate people I've met, however they didn't know how to regulate it.