Lost & Broken (TMNT 2012)

Thoughts Ch.3

Three pain-filled weeks had passed ever since the incident. Mikey felt as if wasn't getting better, though, Donnie told him otherwise. He would say: "The wounds that you have, Mikey, are getting better by the day. It will just take some time."

'I know what I'm feeling... not him...' Mikey thought as he sat on the edge of his bed. His room was a complete wreck, and it lowered his mood even more. It's not like he was able to fix it though. Every time he bent down to pick up the pizza boxes and action figures that were scattered across the floor, an intense pain would come from Mikey's shell. The gash on his back was taking longer to heal than the other wounds on his body. Mikey had to stop himself from beating himself up in frustration. Usually, after the fights between himself, Mikey would cry to himself as defeat came to him. 'I'm never going to get better...' he told himself.

Mikey started to fall into a depressed state. He could only watch his brothers spar during training. He was excluded from the events. Then, he had to stay home from patrol because of his injuries. Mikey didn't completely hate this though. While his brothers were gone on patrol, Mikey would stay in his room and stare at the knife that he stole from Raph's room from a few months back. Without realizing it, Mikey began to think horrible thoughts-- hurtful thoughts aimed towards himself.

This time was different. Mikey reached for the knife that he had been staring at. He slowly took it out of its sheath. He had a nervous expression on his face as he stared into the knife's shiny blade. He could perceive his own reflection. Once seeing the bruises on his own face, Mikey groaned loudly in annoyance and jabbed the knife into his nightstand. His anger took a hold of him, and his breathing became hard and short.

"Mikey?! Are you okay?!" He heard Leo yell as his footsteps became apparent. Mikey hadn't realized that his brothers got back from their patrol. Mikey's eyes widened in panic. He frantically glanced around before throwing the knife into a pile of pizza boxes. He then hid the knife's sheath behind him. Milliseconds after he did this, Leo barged into his room. His face had concern shown all over it as he made his way over to his younger brother.

"What happened? Why did you yell? Are you okay?" Leo asked, hovering his hands over Mikey's arms.

"I'm fine..." Mikey muttered, glancing to the left, avoiding eye contact.

"What happened, Michael?" Leo asked again. This time, Leo reached for Mikey's chin and forced him to look upwards. They then made eye contact. Leo could notice the glossiness in Mikey's eyes as he began to shed a few tears.

Leo questioned once again, "Mikey... What happened, buddy...?"

Mikey quickly wiped his eyes with his forearm and pulled away from his brother's grasp. Leo kneeled to the ground in order to get a better look at Mikey's expression.

The two stayed silent for a while before Mikey finally spoke up. "I'm fine... Can you please just leave me alone...?"

Leo felt compelled on whether he should do as his brother asked or stay where he was sitting.

"Leo! Leave!" Mikey hollered. He could feel the warm years rolling down his face as he pushed his brother backwards. Leo scrunched his face up before nodding and getting back to his feet. He took one last glance at Mikey before heading out of the room, slowly closing the door after him.

After Mikey was sure that Leo had left, he quickly scrambled to the pizza boxes that he had thrown the knife into and quietly grunted as he bent down to get a better look. The pain in his shell sprang a shock through his body and he fell to the ground.

The occasional 'ow' came from Mikey's mouth as he lay on the hard ground with his face hiding in the crevice of his left arm. Only moments later, he began to feel around for the knife with his right hand. Once identifying the object by touch, Mikey clenched his hand into a fist, grasping onto the knife. Without knowing beforehand, Mikey had grabbed onto the blade, rather than the handle.