Eye For An Eye

Three

Amaya.

He didn't say a word to me neither did I him.
But I wanted to, I had so many questions I wanted to ask him and not only that I wanted to punch him for lying to me.

"You're quiet"
"What do you expect me to say? Huh?" I ask looking at me. He spares me and glance and continues driving "Will she be okay?"

"Really? You think that's what I want to talk about?"
He stays quiet.
"I hate it when you do that. Choosing what you want to answer and ignoring me"

He sighs "None of the questions you asked me are questions that really need answers. We both know that"
I groan "You're so frustrating to talk to, I don't know why I ever liked you"

Jazeel has always been coming to the house. Just not frequently, in fact rarely. Auntie had complained but he still doesn't like to until he has to.

I always found him attractive. He knew how to mind his business, never paid attention to the gossips and feuds happening in the house and never chose a side even though everyone knows he's on his sister's side.

He only talked to me. Even when my older sisters would flirt and throw themselves at him he never gave them a second look. He was always either with my brothers and cousins or with me, it made me feel lucky—like he saw me.

I have 23siblings, 9siblings from my mother and I am sure as hell I'm not the prettiest, sexiest or funniest out of my 14sisters so my confidence—I always left it out the door when I get back home. When I'm outside I feel like I can shine but here, it's like I'm not even a competition so when he picked me out of all of them to pal up with, it made me feel seen and appreciated.

Yes he never flirted or led me on, in fact if not for my own delusions this man never showed any interest in me romantically but I kept falling for him, over and over and over again at least until I couldn't stand being with any other man if it wasn't him.

Thing is this happened within just a few months last year. One day I woke up and decided not to keep quiet about my feelings anymore so I spoke up. Confessed and he turned me down. Told me that he was already 'betrothed' to another.

I tried to keep things normal but he started avoiding—no ignoring me. Like I was invisible and that hurt me so much. Then I started dating other men, trying to get his attention but it was all so worthless—for him to get jealous he'd have to care first—there'd have to be feelings.

I've been brainstorming, trying to think of ways to get to him but with my mother and his sister being sworn enemies, there's not much I can do if he's not interested and now—she has taken him away too?
I'm not going to let it slide.

And if I want to make him mine then I need to play it cool. If I try anything he'll see me from a mile away but my dear friend—well, she's clueless.

"I'm sorry, I know I overreacted but you can't blame me, okay? You told me you were engaged and now it makes me wonder if you lied just to get me out of your hair and it doesn't really feel good. It's not like I'm a pest that can't take denial. If you're not interested that's fine but you didn't have to lie"

He shakes his head "I didn't lie" he starts, his voice sounding remorseful "I was engaged but I broke it off a month ago"
"Because of Ersana?"

He nods.
So she's a worth it but I'm not. I should hate him, I really should but—I can't.

"Fine I understand that you like her but did you really have to start ignoring me? Was that really necessary?"
"You liked me, it would be unfair for me to pretend like nothing happened, my intention wasn't to hurt you"