Star Crossed (Kellin Quinn Fanfic)

Four

There are 2 more days left of school before I can finally leave. Only 2. I can survive. I can do this. 12 hours isnt that long. I will do this. Kellin has been walking me to the end of my street everyday since we met, and for those few minutes I feel happy, whole again, like Im actually alive. But, as soon as he leaves...everything turns to shit. I think the problem is Im wanting to feel like I do with Kellin all the time, and because he is the person making me feel that way, I need and miss him more than anything and anyone else. Even Mavis has given up on me now. I've been more depressed than ever when Kellin isnt around, because when my mood is lifted by him, as soon as he goes I fall back down again and hit the ground hard, and it hurts. I wish he knew how much he has helped me, how much I need him. But if I told him, he'd probably get creeped out, right? We only met a couple days ago. It'd be weird to tell him.

Kellin texted me this morning, saying he couldnt walk home with me today. I told him it was fine, but it wasnt. Im in the park now, curled up against a tree, sobbing hysterically. Because today Im not getting even a minutes relief, a couple of seconds happiness. Not that I deserve it. I've been so lucky the past couple days, but I dont deserve it. Im always hopeful about seeing Kellin again, its the reason I get out of bed nowadays, its made the insults from home and school more bearable. But without him here...its worse than before. And to be completely honest it fucking sucks. My phone vibrates in my pocket.

Kellin: How was school? :)

Me: Shit like always, how's your day been?

Kellin: Alright I guess, I wish I could see you though. Im sorry your day was shit. :(

Me: Its fine, its not your fault, Im glad you've had an alright day.

Kellin: Are you ok? :O

Me: Yeah, why?

Kellin: Because you arent sending emojis, you always send emojis. ;)

Me: Im fine, honest.

Kellin: No you're not!

Me: How'd you know?

Kellin: If you were alright you wouldnt be sobbing while curled up against a tree!

I look up from my phone and see Kellin standing at the gate with his phone in his hand. We both shove our phones in our pockets and he runs over to me. He pulls me into his arms and cradles me like a baby.
"Whats wrong Ali?" He asks worriedly.
I cry into his shirt for about five minutes, not giving him an answer. Eventually, when Im actually able to speak, I tell him everything. And by that I mean EVERYTHING. Everything my mother has said to me, what I think of her, the way I feel basically all the time, but I didnt tell him about my cuts. So I guess I didnt tell him everything. I told him everything he needs to know. My self harm is something only me and my mother know about, and she only knows because she's caught me and seen my blood on my bedroom carpet. Its a private thing. Even though Kellin is my only happiness, I cant bring myself to tell him. I have a feeling it would upset him and thats the last thing I want to do. I wouldnt be able to live with myself if I made him sad. By the time Im done explaining myself, Im sobbing into his shirt again.
"Holy shit Ali, I had no idea! That bitch! How dare she say that shit to you! You arent ugly or fat, you're beautiful! Dont listen to a word that bitch says, she doesnt deserve to breathe the same air as you! Howcome I've never seen you like this before?" He raises an eyebrow.
I sniffle "B-Because when Im with y-you, I dont feel like shit, wh-when Im with you...Im happy, Im smiling, and only you have that affect on me, you're m-my only relief, the only thing that brings me happiness!" I burst into tears again.
Kellin kisses my hair "Awww Ali, you're fucking adorable! Im so glad I make you happy! You only have a couple days left of school, right?" I nod, Kellin continues "Well, how about at the end of it all we run away together?"
My jaw drops "B-But your friends!?! Your family!?! Y-You'd do that!?!"
He smiles down at me "I'd do it for you."

We discuss our plan of action, on the last day he'll walk me to the end of my street, I'll run upstairs and grab my previously packed suitcase, I'll climb down the drain pipe at the side of my window and run to Kellin who'll be waiting in his car at the end of my street. I cant wait. Life is going to be so much better soon. It'll take me time to get used to being happy all the time, but Im sure I'll be fine with fitting into this new lifestyle. Im so excited! Its like the clouds of my world have parted and the sun rays are shining through, and its fucking beautiful.