Loving Yous A Little Bit Hard Sometimes / Bruce Banner

32. How to Hulk

'You feeling better?' Bruce asked as he laid a pancake in front of Jen, 'listen I know this is hard to hear but you're going to have to change the way you live your life avoid stressful situation stay away from people-'

'I can't stay away from people how am I supposed to do my job?' Jen asked him

'you can't go back to your job-'

'I don't know having a superhuman lawyer would be kind of bad ass I think that would be really beneficial if you kept up your degree.' Alisha told her confidently. "I mean we were always being sued by the law for breaking some building or another while saving the world from usually aliens."

''You can stay here until you can control your whole self.' Bruce corrected. "Lida, it can be dangerous for her, and others she needs to know that." Maria shoved a pancake in her mouth and Anthony grumbled slapping a hand down. 

'and how long is that gonna take?' jen questioned

'Syrup.' Maria requested through a full mouth, Alisha squirted some on her plate. 

''This is a multiyear journey you're about to embark on coming to terms with being a hulk,' he said putting a binder on the table

'Since when did you start doing scrapbooking Brucie... that's so cute.' Alisha cooed, Bruce blushed. "Very manly."

'Thank you." Bruce agreed sarcastically, "I meant it as a guideline but it turned out being a syllabus and here we are,' Bruce said looking between them 'now with my help hopefully your progress will go a little bit faster than mine," he said flipping through it.

'you said multi year?'

'about 15 years give or take.' Bruce said and Jen spit out her juice.

'I'm not sticking around for 15 years, I got shit to do.' Jen told him.

'Shit." Maria repeated. 

"No, no word." Alisha corrected kissing her sticky cheek. 

"Sorry," Jen murmured. 

''Jen, our top priority is to control when you turn.'

++

'At what point is this going to prevent me from turning into the hulk?' Jen questioned she was inside a chamber specialized for Hulks, a helmet on her head that was going to censor her emotions or feelings

'We need to know the distressed emotional state to which it causes it for you.' Alisha told her.

'Put on a Pixar movie!' Jen exclaimed

'Stop,' Bruce said 'you need to focus the triggers are anger and fear.'

'Those are the baseline of any woman just existing,' Jen told him

'She's really not wrong.' Alisha agreed "We were watching lightyear on the way here, it is so cute. Oh and Mari wants a Buzz lightyear doll when we find a ToysRus."

'Just try,' Bruce instructed. The cage started shrinking and blade started spinning. Alisha's eyes went wide. 

"What the hell did you and tony do to this place?" Alisha demanded. "I dont recall this."

"We made some modifications." Bruce shrugged. 

"This is... insane." Alisha corrected. 

'Why does it feel like if I don't transform I'm going to die!' Jen screamed pushing herself further away from the spinning blades 'is there a Plan B for that?'

'No.' Bruce answered and Alisha eyed him nervously.

'This isn't funny Bruce are you gonna kill me,' she said pulling off the helmet and it went shattering into the blades she pushed herself up against the wall.

'Put the hat back on that's how we judge-'

'Bruce are you sure this is a good idea? I think there's a very bad idea you're gonna kill your cousin.' Alisha reasoned. "What if-"

"She's a hulk, her body won't let her." Bruce reminded her.

"But she's different from you, we dont know how her Hulk-ness works, what if-" Alisha countered. 

'I am not going to kill my cousin.' Bruce told her confidently.

'What else do you use this chamber for you psychopath!' Jen shouted as she shifted pushing the blade back before grabbing the door breaking it open, pulling it free from its hinges and throwing it at Bruce she screamed out as Alisha's suit activated flying her back her shields up and ready.

'No no no, whoa whoa easy girl easy.' Bruce cooed.

'Why are you talking to me like I'm a stray horse?' Jen questioned green and pissed.

'Jen?'

'Yeah...' she said green and completely annoyed but still Jen.

'She's still her?' Alisha questioned looking between them. "How is she... Bruce?"

''You're still Jen right now?' Bruce asked also amazed. 

"yeah and I'm conscious...' Jen remarked.

'This is incredible you don't have an altar ego, you're the only one in there?' Bruce couldn't believe this.

'As far as I can tell.' she said putting her hands on her hips

'This is huge Jen!" Bruce exclaimed. 

'Wow she really is better than you.' Alisha agreed.

'I think I'm jealous is that what I'm feeling right now?" Bruce questioned

'Well green is your color.' Alisha reminded him kissing his cheek. 

'You don't have another guy to wrestling with for 10 years!' Bruce declared.

'Cool,' jen said nonchalantly.

'that's about $1 million worth of damage back there by the way...'

'I can fix it for you Brucie.' Alisha told him. "Now that I know what the hell this is."

'you really don't feel like there's another hand on the wheel at all?' Bruce questioned. She turned back to him.

'No... it is just me' Jen confirmed. 'The first time it was so intense I could barely understand what's happening but now it's like you're settled in,' Bruce picked up his binder tearing out the first 50 pages sprawling them across the desk. 'Yeah it kind of seems like I'm done here,' she decided.

'Not so fast you can't control when you transform.'' Bruce corrected. 

''How do I turn back into Jen how did you do it?' Jen questioned.

''Well we pushed him out of a jet, a giant iron bot pummeled him that was interesting," Alisha recalled, Bruce grumbled. "sometimes I would sing him a lullaby which helped but Hulk has a crush on me so it didnt always work to get bruce back but it calmed him down."

'And then I would wake up as banner.' Bruce agreed.

'Usually butt ass naked,' Alisha added slapping his ass. 

'It seems like a common thread that was being unconscious.' Jen remarked

'Not necessarily one time I was stuck as the other guy for over two years.'

'I can't stay like this for two years,' Jen said walking towards the stairs

'you have so much more to learn about being a hulk I don't think you've thought through how dangerous this level of power is. You know the damage you can cause when a mistake one freak out is literally life or death.' Bruce told her

'OK I'll be careful.' Jen told them and Alisha chuckled.

"She will be careful.' Alisha agreed sniggering. "Listen to this woman."

"I thought you were on my side?" Jen countered. 

'You can't be emotional forget all rage just regular anger means deadly destruction for everyone around you and people start seeing you as a monster that never goes away.' Bruce told her.

'He's not wrong,' Alisha assured her "Listen to him, he knows this better than anyone."

'Fine teach me how to... HULK please.'