Conflicted - Twist Of Fate

Aiden.

"Armina, wake up."

I put my pillow over my head.
I don't want to.
Today was testing day.
The day I promised Aiden, I would stop hiding my true potential and show my classmates who I am.

You see, I have not been honest with those around me about what I can do.
Abandoned at an orphanage when I was a baby, I've never known who I am or where I come from.

Aiden adopted me when I was estimated to be a few weeks old. No one really knows. Left in a blanket on the orphanage door with not so much as a note. This fact has always haunted me. Not knowing who I was, who my family was, or why I was unwanted from such a young age. 

Aiden is the beta of our pack Blood Moon. While those who knew him growing up called him a loving, caring person. Yet he was also the most feared warrior among the kingdom, with the royal lycans having tried to recruit him from a young age. This alone made him a legend, Lycans saw us werewolves as less than them. A weaker species. 

That all changed when our rival pack Eclipse attacked, killing his mate Elena and changing his outlook on the world. Turning him dark, paranoid and angry.

When pack mates started to fear him more than they respected him, our alpha Ethan tried to convince him to take a chosen mate to recover his humanity. Refusing, he took another option to show his family values.
Adopting a pup.

However, Aiden feared loving me would give the Eclipse pack a reason to hurt me. Not wanting their cruel alpha to target me next.

In private, Aiden showed me love, always comforting; supporting and training me. He had always pushed me to be strong, showed me how special I was and encouraged me to do better in everything I do in life. In public, he treats me as a burden, a necessary evil to keep his ranking in the pack. He made sure no one knew how much he truly loved me.

Aiden explained this all to me from a young age.
While I didn't always understand and would be hurt by his words in public, I could sense his love and knew he was there for me.

"Armina," I shake my head. Knowing he has made his way to my door.
"Come on, this is an exciting day," I scoff.
"It's time to stop hiding Armina." Aiden's tone takes on his authorative tone.

Being born with eyes that gleamed purple (my wolf only made this more prominent when she came forward) and being the 'unloved' adoptive daughter of the most feared beta of the kingdom didn't make me popular at school.

In training, I had always held back. Never letting myself be badly beaten but not enough to stand out. While most wolves get their wolf at 17, I got mine at 14. None of my classmates knew this. My wolf Aurora didn't agree with me hiding. She used to always push at my block, begging to be free to show exactly what she was capable of. She had always been my biggest supporter, my best friend, my soul mate. 

"Aiden, I'm not ready." I shake my head into my pillow. I feel a hand on my shoulder, "Armina, you have been ready for these tests since you were a toddler, none of your classmates stand a chance." I lift my head and look at his face.

Aiden's bright blue eyes look back at me, his sandy blonde hair framing his face as he stares into my eyes. Aiden is a handsome man for a nearly 40 year old.

Many shewolves in our pack still fawn over him, wishing he'd take them as a chosen mate despite the cruel demeanour he fakes around them. His eyes only ever soften when we are alone. The times when he feels safe to show his affection.

Elena was Aiden's everything. Being best friends growing up before being ecstatic to find out they were destined mates on her 17th birthday. Since then, his wolf Dimitri had convinced him to lock away his heart and hide his true nature from around those who may use it against him. Aiden has always felt responsible for Elena's death, believing she wouldn't have been on their radar at all if not for being his mate.  

"Armina, you've hidden long enough," his voice darkening. "You're one to talk," I say without thinking; the moment I see his blue eyes sadden, I regret my words. I'm about to apologise when he shakes his head.
"You're right," my eyes widen, it is not something he admits often. "I'll stop if you do," my mind blanks.
He can't be serious.
Aiden has never shown me love in public, laughing when I lose battles; barely acknowledging my existence outside of our home.
As I have aged and matured I understand completely. If packs knew he cared about me, I'd probably be dead by now.
"Aiden"
I put my head back into my pillow. The tests are a series of physical and mental trials that determine your ranking among wolves.
You can be an omega; where your role is normally that of service. Helping in the pack house; cooking, cleaning, and serving. If you are considered intellectual, you can also become a teacher, a pack doctor, or run another business such as a store, a nursery of anything else you desire that serves a purpose in our ciommunity. Those wolves still train and mainly battle only when it is war.
One of the more respected rankings is a warrior, where your life is about training and defending your pack. These wolves put the safety of the pack above all else in their lives.
One of the most highest honors is becoming an Elite Warrior, where you are trained to lead the warriors; a coveted position of extreme respect and power.

 
Or the very rare beta, where you are trained to take over the role of beta should they stand down or you can challenge them for their role of being second in command to the alpha. Any of these are what we all thrive for in school.

There is another rank, one only for females and one no one wants. A breeder. These wolves are considered only of use to grow the pack, being used by higher ranking pack members to bring more wolves into the world. These ones are not respected enough to be allowed to save themselves for their fated mates, no matter what they feel or dream for. Their future is taken from them. 

I knew I wouldn't be deemed a breeder. I have a 4.0 grade average and could easily become a pack doctor. Aiden wanted more for me. He thought I should be an elite warrior. I just didn't know if I wanted that. Did I want to be a leader of the same people who treat me like I don't matter?

"Armina, stop" I shake my head refusing to look up. The trials are in an hour. If I can stall, I can avoid them. My grade average would allow me to slip straight into university.

"Armina, this is my fault and I'm so sorry" his sad tone brings me out of my pillow. Looking back at him I see him looking shamefully down at his hands. By instinct I sit up and reach for his hand. I have never been able to handle seeing him upset.

"Aiden, don't." I touch his cheek, feeling the wetness of his tears. "I've taught you to hide" I shake my head. "I understand why you did Aiden, if you didn't I would have been attacked by now" I say the words out of habit. Remembering him having me repeat them as a child when I was upset about the way he acted in front of the pack.

"No Armina, you've been strong enough to defend yourself for years now" he finally looks into my eyes. "I have always treated you like I'd lose you, like Elena, but Elena wasn't a warrior, you are" his eyes take on a new shade, an eagerness to have me believe him.

"Please Armina, don't let my weakness hold you back, it's time to show everyone who you are" as his words sink in my wolf Aurora stirs "about time he started talking sense" feeling her awake fills me with joy. She has shut me out for months now, having become angry at me constantly pushing her back, having her watch as I threw fights I could easily win. A sense of power and confidence flows from her to me. Reminding me we are one. 

Feeling them both pushing me forward I find myself nodding. "Let's go" I nod, glad to see Aiden start to smile. Guess its show time.

"Okay, let's do this" he stands and I follow.