Of Roses Red and Violet

Crying and Crushing

Gilly and Anthony headed back to her room where it was almost time for her to sleep. "Thank you, Ives" "Please, call me Anthony." He bowed and left her in her room. Gilly changed into a pale blue night gown with a matching silk robe and slippers. She didn't plan on sleeping soon but it wasn't a bad idea to be ready to. "Excuse me, I will be back. There is an incident in the gambling room." Anthony left the corridor, leaving Gilly by herself.

Gilly brushed out her hair then placed it into a water fall braid. She kept her eyes on the door as she looked into the mirror. Footsteps began walking down the hall towards her room and Jax appeared. She turned to look at him but he didn't look happy. "So this is what you have been busy with?" Gilly groaned and stood up to meet him.

"I have been busy getting closer to Alva. She's started trusting me more with her secrets and I even found out more information about her." Jax rolled his eyes. "Care to share or are you going to just keep it to yourself like always?" Gilly stepped back. "Why are you so mad?" "Why am I so mad? Are you being serious or has Alva done something to your head?" Jax got closer to her face. "Because you have just been ignoring your crew who ,by the way, came here to help you and instead of being just a little bit grateful, you push us all away and ignore us?!"

"I was busy ok I'm sorry!" "I've tried messaging you, visiting you, but you're always out with Alva, the other courtiers, or that stupid general!" Gilly's heart pounded as his tone rose. "I have been trying to find out more information thank you!" "And what do you plan to do with it?! Become Alva's favorite until she decides to kill you?!" "What has gotten into you?!" "What has gotten into to me?! Me?! Really?!"

Jax backed her into her bed post and gave her barely any breathing room. "I have been on your side since the moment we met! I've defended your actions and done my best to help you but you can't stop thinking of anyone but yourself!" Gilly felt her ears turn red. Jax was going into a mental part of Gilly that she hated.

"You just keep doing whatever you want and not consulting us! We're a team! Not your servants who will do whatever you want!" "Of course you'd know about that since you're all high and mighty being a prince!" Jax's eyes turned narrow as his fists clenched. "Are you really always going to go back to that?! That I'm a prince and I must have a perfect life?! What about you, huh?!"

"What about me?! What do YOU have to say about ME?!" Their eyes interlocked and Jax looked as if he was ready to explode . "You've literally only been thinking of yourself since we got here! The way you treated Maxine! Ignoring us! Playing Princess with Alva! Look!" He pointed to her pajamas. "You're even dressing like you're Alva's heir to throne! Is she the new royal who you intend to use to get what you want?!"

"You're selfish!" "Shut up!" Gilly started slipping away from him. "No, we're not done!" "Yes we are!" "No we're not!" She turned towards the door but Jax yanked on her arm hard. "Gilly!-" Gilly slapped him and pushed him off of her. Gilly held her arm that was now turning red from the force of Jax's arm. She paused once she realized what she had done. Jax didn't make eye contact with her, only holding the side of his face that now turned pink. He walked out of her room and Gilly opened her mouth to call after him but no sound came out. He slammed the door behind him and didn't look back.

Gilly crumpled onto the floor, holding her bedpost for support. Her breathing became ragged and she tried to calm herself down before she launched into another anxiety attack. Except nothing helped. Every technique she tried, Jax had taught her. And everything reminded her of him. She let go of the post and fell onto the floor, arms in front of her, trying to keep herself steady. Tears flowed out of her eyes and her mouth finally made sound though too late.

"Oh this is all so awful!" She sobbed. Anthony walked in. "Are you alright? I saw a boy leave your room and came to check on you?" Gilly launched a pillow at him. "Get out!" She heaved and held her knees to her chest. Anthony closed the door and retreated as Gilly's sobs grew louder. It was no use crying though. Jax wouldn't come back in and help her this time. She had messed up big time and there was no way he'd forgive her.