Think of Laura

CHAPTER 5: Roy's Burden

I still can't recover of what happened that day ... Several weeks have already passed but still, it feels as if it only happened yesterday. If you're gonna ask me about us - truth is, we're still friends though we confessed our feeling to one another. Maybe we're not yet ready to be in such kind of commitment. But even so, I love her and I know that she loves me too - that's the important thing.

..........

I can't believe it! How many weeks has it been? Hmm ... let me do the math ... OH! 10 weeks!

10 weeks of being a freshman sure is awesome. Yet, it sure brought me a lot of stress - you know, paper works .... paper works .... paper works .... and PAPER WORKS all around the world. Phew!

But anyways, I have them around me - the '3 musketeers' of my life - Roy, Alice and Laura.

We've been together all the way - 10 weeks spent with them and a lot more to go.

..........

But you know what, I've been noticing Roy. He's not acting like himself. It's as if something's bothering him. Whenever the four of us are together, it seems like, we've never met before - he really acts weirdly.

Because of that, I tried asking Laura if she notices the same thing I am noticing.

.........

~ "Laura?"

~ "Yes my Victor? Is something wrong?"

~ "It has something to do with Roy."

~ "Roy? What's with him? Are you having problems with one another?"

~ "Uh, no! It's not that Laura. Have you been noticing his weird acts lately?"

~ "Ahm ... about that Victor, I sure do. It's as if, he's in a big trouble or something."

~ "So, what do you think Laura? Should we talk to him and ask him what's wrong?"

~ "I think so. But, it would probably be better if you do that yourself."

~ "All by myself? But he's your friend too."

~ "I'm aware of that my dear. But you are his best friend. Alice and I are just his friends. If someone will understand him better, that's you Victor."

~ "Oh. Is that so? Alright Laura. I'll talk to him."

..........

I feel quite nervous here. What could his problems be?

..........

~ "Hey Roy! May I have a word with you?"

~ "Not this time Victor."

~ "But Roy ... I just .... What's wrong with you?"

~ "What's wrong with me? Can't you tell it Victor?"

~ "Can't tell what? C'mon Roy. I'm your best friend. I'm sure I would understand you. Tell me what's wrong."

~ "You really can't get it, can you?"

That look in his face ... he never showed me such expression before. I was shocked but I must stay calm. He's my best friend and I must understand him no matter what the cost. So, I looked at him bravely though I rattled and asked him once more:

~ "What's wrong with you?"

~ "All this time Victor ... all this time ... it has always been you! - You for that contest ... you for that task ... you for that ... you for this ... It's always you! How about me?"

~ "Roy? So what are you trying to tell me? Are you ... you ... envious of me?"

~ "YES I AM! Yes Victor ... I am ... I am Victor ... I am (cries)."

That moment ... that very moment ... I saw my best friend's burden. I never thought that I am the cause of it. I felt so guilty .. so undeserving to be called his best friend. I wanted to hug him .. to comfort him and tell him to stop crying. How I wish I could but I can't. He looks so mad at me .. so envious. All I can do is stare at him and ask myself where did I go wrong.

~ "Alright Roy. Now I understand you. I never thought you'd feel that way towards me - to be envious of your own best friend. But let me tell you this, okay? It's not good to compare yourself with me. We're all diffrent. We differ in everything - abilities, traits and all those things. So please Roy, stop this nonsense. Let's be friends again. Don't feel inferior, okay?"

~ "It's easy for you to say 'cause you don't feel what I am feeling right now. It's easy for you to say 'cause you're better than me in everything! "

~ "No Roy. Don't get me wrong."

~ "Don't get you wrong?! But you ... but you stole everything from me!"

~ "Stole everything? Why would I do that Roy? You're my best friend! I don't get it! C'mon!"

~ "The only girl I've loved .... the only girl who made my heart beat like never before. You stole her from me Victor! You stole Laura from me!"

~ "WHAT! Laura? I didn't steal Laura from you. What ... what are you trying to tell me? You loved her eversince?! Oh c'mon! I can't get it!"

~ "Yes Victor. I did! The day you told me what happened between the two of you, I did my best not to get mad at you. I .. I .. I tried my best not to feel jealous because you're my best friend. That's why I did it. I sacrificed my feelings just to see you smile."

~ "ROY! You're not making sense at all! She told me she loves me therefore I did the same thing. Now on the first place, in what way did I steal Laura from you?"

~ "You really wanna know it Victor? You wanna know the truth?"

~ "C'mon! Tell me!"

..........

..........

~ "Laura was my girlfriend."