the unforgiven | james hetfield [2]

thirty seven

chapter thirty seven: healing wounds

Over time, the wounds that Iris had from her separation began to heal. The James that came back all those months ago was not the same one sitting in front of her at this moment.

He came back on his hands and knees begging, not even fully removed from the "lifestyle" he was living just a couple of years before. 

At the time, he claimed that he changed, but they both knew that wasn't the full truth. Why else did they go through such a rough time trying to get her to trust him again?

But now that he was sitting there in front of her, their little baby in his lap, just completely enamored by everything...It made her heart melt.

That was when she realized how far they had come. He could be out doing whatever he wanted, partying without a care in the world, and leaving her with Star.

But he didn't, and he wasn't going to. He didn't even want to. All he wanted to do was be with his little baby, his little ray of sunshine he didn't know he needed all this time.

She loved watching the two of them together. Iris never really understood James's fear of being a parent when it was obvious he was trying his hardest.

Once Star began to calm down and settle into the home, things were a bit easier for them. They were still learning, but able to manage much better than before.

Weekends were now reserved for time to spend with each other. Iris and James hardly went out, always looking after Star and spending the day in with her.

Once in a while, they would go for walks in the park, pushing Star in a little bassinet as she looked at the world around her. Iris didn't like it too much, strangers would crowd around Star and she'd get upset.

So for now, they would stay home and slowly introduce her to the outside world at times. They could already tell she was going to be a clingy and sensitive baby.

Iris went to join James on the couch, where he was currently sitting with Star in his arms, lightly tossing her in the air and making her laugh. 

She always thought they looked so cute together. He was always there to feed her, change her diaper, bathe her, and put her to sleep. Parenting seemed so natural for him. 

In return, Star loved to be around her father. She was like a carbon copy of him, always lifting her tiny arms up to him as if she knew who she looked like the most.

She didn't know who was clingier, him or the baby. Whenever Iris wasn't entertaining her, she was always with James, right in his arms, just like they were right now.

He even tried to communicate with her in baby talk, acting like he knew every word she was babbling. He held Star in front of him, listening to her giggle as she tried to reach for the tips of his blonde hair. 

The minute she sat down, Star looked at Iris, wide-eyed and curious as she tried to recognize who her mother was. "Who's that, baby? Who's that pretty girl?" James cooed in her ear.

Iris felt her cheeks flush and she couldn't resist the smile that formed on her face at his words. "James, please." She rolled her eyes playfully, a warmth settling in her chest.

"What? It's true," He said, winking as if it was nothing. He turned back to Star, holding her closer to Iris this time. "Look baby, that's your mama. That's your pretty mama."

She couldn't help but smile, taking Star into her arms as she continued to look at her with wide eyes. Her tiny arms began to reach towards her, seemingly trusting of Iris. 

"Hi sweetie," Iris smiled as she held her close to her chest, watching her settle in her arms. "You feeling okay? Having fun with daddy?" 

Star babbled as if she was responding to Iris's question, causing the both of them to laugh. She looked up at her mother again, almost as if she was trying to memorize her face.

"Say 'hi mama,'" James jumped in, already wanting to try and get her to say her first words despite being a couple of months old. "How about 'hi dada?'"

Iris laughed as she listened to him, shaking her head. "She's not going to start speaking right away, James."

"I know, I know," He sighed, leaning over to give Star a small kiss on her chubby cheek. "I can't wait to hear her first word. Even if I don't want her to grow up too fast." 

Star settled onto her mother's chest, resting her head and getting a nap in for the rest of the afternoon. She looked so peaceful there, in the safety and comfort of her parents.

James looked over at her with a smirk as he watched Star nap on her chest, causing Iris to raise an eyebrow. "What is that smirk for?" 

"Nothing," James shrugged, playing it off. "Just thinking about how you're a milf now." He said with a knowing smirk, causing Iris to playfully hit his shoulder.

"Oh my god, shut up," She rolled her eyes playfully. "Of course, you would say something like that."

He laughed again, shaking his head. "Just stating the truth. You're the best woman in my life," He leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Best mama now."

She couldn't help but smile as he wrapped his arm around her. "You're so annoying. You're lucky I love you."