More/ 3Racha

>33<

Things had been perfect, too perfect according to Changbin. Which wasn't a very difficult thing to achieve for someone who was constantly anticipating the next down in his life but he couldn't stop thinking about what Jisung had said about anticipating things making them worse.

"Chan?" Changbin asked, walking into the living room and laying his head on the older's lap. Jisung was still asleep in Chan's bed.

"Hmm?"

"Jisung said something to me yesterday and I can't stop thinking about it."

"What was it?" Chan asked, playing with Changbin's hair.

"I told him about my depression and stuff and he said 'anticipating it will only make it worse' which I get could be something that anyone would say and understand but-"

"Binnie, if you're stressed so much about something like that just ask him. We're your boyfriends. you should be comfortable talking to us about anything."

"Yeah but how do you ask someone that. Do you also have depression? Do we share the same mental illness."

"Well obviously not like that," Chan shook his head.

"But-"

"Hi!" Jisung said as he walked into their apartment since the door was unlocked and laid over both of his boyfriend's laps.

"How was your day baby?" Chan asked, dropping the conversation with Changbin since that obviously wasn't something he was going to try and talk to Jisung to about the second he walked into the door.

"It was good, how was yours?" He asked glancing back and forth between both of his boyfriends.

"Good," they both said pretty much at the same time.

"Are you hungry at all? Changbin and I were just talking about what we should eat for dinner."

"Yeah, a little bit."

"Okay, I'm gonna go grab something. I'll be back in a little while."

"Wait what? I'll go with you so you don't have to go by yourself," Jisung offered.

"No, it's okay you just got off of work. Stay here with Changbin," Chan said, getting up off of the couch which left Jisung sitting on Changbin's lap.

He gave them both a quick kiss before walking about of the house, saying a quick "love you" as a goodbye.

"Why are you so quiet love?" Jisung tilted his head and wrapped his arms around Changbin's neck.

"Since when did you start using nicknames?" Changbin questioned back, holding onto Jisung's waist.

"It just seems fitting. But seriously, is something wrong?"

"I'm just overthinking about stupid stuff, don't worry about it."

"You can always talk to me about it if you think that it would help," Jisung offered which finally seemed comforting enough for Changbin to bring it up.

"You know the thing you said yesterday about how anticipating things will only make it worse?"

"Mhm, why?"

"Don't take this in a rude way please, I'm just asking because I'm concerned but um...you don't? You don't feel that way, right?"

"Depressed?" Jisung asked and Changbin slowly nodded.

"I mean- you don't have to talk to me about it or answer that question if you don't want to."

"I'm your boyfriend. You should be comfortable asking me anything."

"But that doesn't mean you have to be comfortable enough to respond."

"It's okay, I promise," Jisung reassured, "I was when I was in high school. I guess I can still feel that was sometimes, but everyone does a little bit. It's definitely not as bad as it used to be."

"What did it use to be like?" Changbin asked, wrapping his arms around Jisung and leaning his chin onto his shoulder.

"Sleeping all the time, not answering my phone ever, graded slipping, other stuff."

Changbin wanted to ask what "other stuff" meant but he didn't want to push anymore than he already had and he was afraid of what the answer would be anyways

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay Bin, when did yours start if you don't mind me asking?"

"I don't remember...do you think it's possible for mine to go away- or I mean at least not be as bad anymore like that?"

"Try to stop anticipating it," Jisung said, showing his boyfriend a small smile. "You can talk to me about this stuff whenever you want to."

"Okay, thank you Sungie."

"Of course."

short chapter bc half of it was already written and  I have to reread the entire thing before i can write any more 😭