Summer Of Broken Hearts.

chapter 4

Hours became days, days into weeks, and weeks into months. I began questioning my life—where did it all go? Such a rhetorical question. It had been three months, and I was starting to ask myself what I did wrong, but no answer came. Then, why me? But of course, how could I know such a thing when the person who needs to answer is a plane ride away? How inconvenient, right?

Questioning my life became my ultimatum. I felt like I had been in a dream, only to wake up in a nightmare called reality. What was more uncomfortable was that I didn't know who to talk to about this. Sure, I could go to a professional and spill the beans like nothing, but I wasn't expecting them to solve my problems. First things first. Second, I had a big problem with trust when it came to strangers, and an outsider wouldn't make a difference in making my life better.

I could talk to Cara, but I thought she had enough of her own problems to sort mine out too. And about Sara, well... let's just say we're on standby. I wasn't ready to do therapy with her, especially since she would just drink away her sorrows until she was intoxicated.

The worst part of this situation was the cheating. I wasn't dealing well with it. But that's part of the breakup, or so I guess.

Thursday, the worst Thursday of my life, was quiet on the streets, and worse, it was dead in the store. But you know, another day, another dollar, or so they say. Cara and I were talking for hours about Stephen King, the writer of IT, Carrie, and The Dark Tower. It felt like yesterday when I could have those books in my hands and read them. Cara's mind was blown; she was talking about how much she loved the books. Meanwhile, my head was thinking, where are we going this summer? I could believe I was talking with Sara about having a girl's trip. I decided to text her while still listening to Cara, who was so excited about Stephen King's books.

<<Hey girl, wanna meet up tomorrow to decide where we're going for holiday? xx>>

She didn't answer immediately. I just needed to wait for her response. Cara changed the subject, explaining something juicy about a friend of hers. That friend had been cheated on by her girlfriend and, as revenge, did the same.

"Good grief, Cara, that's messed up," I replied, thinking about how I'd just been cheated on.

"I know, how twisted is that shit?" she said, her eyes wide, like things were getting worse.

After that, we changed the subject. She was more interested in how I was doing.

"So, in these three months, has anything good happened to you? Someone new, maybe?" she asked, opening TikTok.

"Not really. I just opened an account on Tinder. I haven't spoken to anyone yet. But who knows?" I said, a bit animated.

"Ah, that's good. You need to move on from that scary bitch," Cara said, pissed off about Lydia.

"I know, but I'm not ready for a relationship. Meeting someone would be nice, though," I commented.

"That's the spirit," she said, cheering me up.

I wasn't very convinced about this Tinder account. I hadn't had good experiences with it before. But I decided to give it another shot, just in case something happened. Who knows, maybe I'd find someone interesting. Suddenly, Sara replied.

<<Hi girl, vacation mode is on. Cillian and I went to Vienna. Sorry, maybe another time. xx>>

Son of a bitch, I thought to myself. I took a deep breath and did the boldest thing I could do: I reserved my holidays. After a couple of hours, Cara finished her shift, and I was getting along. The store was still dead. No soul came in the whole day. I bet everyone was on holiday.

I sat at the back of the store and began to look into trips. Something was telling me Denmark. Why? I didn't know, but I always wanted to visit the Scandinavian countries. So, I checked everything: Airbnb, flights, all planned so I wouldn't need to worry about anything.

After that, I closed the store for the day and began matching with guys and girls on Tinder who I thought were interesting. I left them messages on the app, so they could reach out whenever they felt like it.