Down Bad (Buck x Eddie)

Chapter Two: Tis The Damn Season

Evan "Buck" Buckley
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One week has passed since my return to 118 and Bobby told me I'm finally allowed to return to the field.

Sort of. I'm not allowed to go respond to the dangerous and physically demanding calls, whatever that means, but I sure as hell am able to go save a boy who got stuck in a tree.

Before the accident, I would've appreciated these small, low demand calls, especially between the bigger calls we got.

But now? I'm just bored. I've been cleared by three different doctors, a therapist, and even by Bobby himself to return to work, but he's making me take it slow.

I don't want to go slow. I never want to go slow.

I unpack all of my gear into the storage space for it next to the truck and I turn to see my older sister entering at the same time.

"What are you doing right now?" She asks as she approaches. I shrug.

"This. Working. Like you should be doing right now?" I reply with a laugh and she swats my shoulder.

"Actually, I'm on lunch. Wanted to check in on you," She replies as we sit down on the wooden bench, "You haven't really been returning my calls since you returned to work. What's up with that?"

I shrug, "Just been busy these last few days."

"Doing what? Pushing papers? I had to find out from Bobby that you've been pretty angsty since you came back."

What the hell does that mean? And why did he go to my sister instead of talking to me about it?

"I'm just taking it all in."

"Then why are you treating the new guy like crap?" She retorts and I sigh. Of course, Bobby set her up to talk to me about the Eddie situation.

"I'm not. I'm just coping with the whole coming back."

"You're full of shit and you know it, Buck." Maddie replies and sets her purse down next to her, turning to face me. Almost as if she's squaring up with me.

"He's just, I see a lot of myself in him and I don't want Bobby to think I'm not good enough and replace me with the new guy." I answer shyly, looking down.

"Buck, no one can replace you. You know that, right?"

"I dunno. Abby replaced me with a different guy in Europe and didn't even bother to properly break up with me." I tell her. I don't like to talk about the Abby situation much, but it feels applicable here.

"Well, Abby was a bitch, and I never even met her. But no one can replace you. You're my little brother and you're smart and quick-witted and know how to connect with people. You're a Buckley." She tells me, her hand clasping my shoulder. Maddie pulls me into her embrace and I wrap my arms around her and take in her embrace. Maybe I am being too hard on Eddie?

Then I'm reminded of the shower incident.

"I think the new guy was hitting on me."

She quickly pulls away, "What?"

"I accidentally walked in on him in the shower and he said I had a nice ass," I admit to her. That felt good to bring up because I haven't been able to talk to anyone else about it, "Is he gay?"

"I don't know. He never has said anything about it, but I'm assuming if he complemented my ass, he is."

"Are you gay? Is that why you're so angsty with him? Because you have a boy-crush?" She asks noisily. I'm not gay. At least I don't think so. I never really thought about having sex with a guy. I've had sex with plenty of women in my lifetime, about twelve to be exact.