I Don't Mind

Chapter 2

Derek's POV 

What's up everyone?

I'm Derek if you didn't know, I play cornerback and will most likely start for UCLA this season. I'm excited as hell to be honest, I'm going D1 and to a power 5 conference school at that. This is big for me, I'm kind of achieving my dreams now. 

I'm stressed about some things though. 

One of those things is Adrian Sanders. 

He is a good friend of mine, but he walked in on me fucking a random blonde guy. By the way, that kid that I fucked thanked me for the sex and left. I didn't say a word to him, and I haven't seen him since. That's one way to lose my virginity. 

In a sense, I'm relieved to not have seen him again. That whole thing was a massive mistake on my part. I never should've led him on and brought him to the locker rooms. He said I was super attractive. He was cute I guess, but my emotions were completely taking control of me. I was so broken by the fact that Cameron does, in fact, like dudes. 

I was crushing over him for years and thought for sure that he was straight and that I didn't have a chance with him, but the minute we win the state championship, he kisses Aaron.

His boyfriend.

My best friend is my crush's boyfriend. I'm happy for them, but I can't tell myself that I'm not jealous. I wish I was in Aaron's shoes. Cam is so fucking amazing. He's the most attractive person I've ever seen. I guess it shouldn't be that weird that the two of them ended up together. Aaron is also one of the most attractive people I've ever seen, so it works for two cuties to be together.

I was just so frustrated, and when I saw that blonde guy, all I could see was Cameron, and shit went down from there. Adrian walked in while I was fucking this guy, all the way, like no coming back from this type shit. 

I should've assumed that someone would catch us, the blonde guy was screaming at the top of his lungs while I was fucking him. I know I'm big, but I didn't realize I was that big. Either that or he was exaggerating. 

It doesn't matter. Adrian knows I'm gay. Apparently he already knew that because I told him that I'm gay when I was drunk at one of Jax's parties, but I didn't remember that. He brought it up and I denied it. These allegations are not going to be escaped though. He knows 100% now that I like dudes, there's nothing that will change his mind. 

I don't know what I'll do now. I might have to just scare him or something, you know, turn on my intimidating side and turn my nice goofy side off. It won't be that tough, I do that in games, now I just have to do it all the time. That also means being cold to people. 

I don't enjoy being mean to people. People are chill. I like people. I like Adrian too, but the prospect of him possibly outing me is a little bit scary. My mom would go fucking crazy on me. I know I'm in college, but my mom could and would still find a way to ruin my life. She'd talk to the coach, tell him to kick me off the team, and make me go back there to put me in some Christian school. 

I love God and everything, but God don't know you. My mom looks like a number one fan, and God don't think about her one minute of the day. I doubt he cares that much about gay people either, we haven't done anything that completely screws with his operations, whatever they may be. 

Anyways, I'm currently sitting on a couch with DeShaun, Jax, and Kai while Devin is probably upstairs facetiming Alicia and Cam and Aaron are out doing whatever. The two of them, according to the stories that everyone else insisted they tell, were already in a sexual relationship before they started dating. They said they'd been in a relationship like that since August of last year. That's a really long time.