Back At Sixteen

Chapter eight

Drizzle had been a constant companion since the second week of February, casting a gloomy shadow over everything. I've never been a fan of rainy days, for a million reasons. It's not just the dampness and the inconvenience, but the way it makes me feel. I can't help but sober down when the skies weep.

The 28th marked the longest drizzle of the month, and a foreboding feeling settled in the pit of my stomach as I contemplated the upcoming month.

Lately, something strange has been happening. I find myself responding to the persistent questions of those two boys at school, engaging in conversations with my classmates, and even noticing the once-dismissed Azeeza in a different light. It's unsettling, to say the least. Azeeza, the ugly mutt, seems to be growing prettier by the day. I refuse to believe it, but there's no denying the change.

Could it be that I'm starting to see things differently, or worse, starting to care? The thought is absurd.

Perhaps she's playing some kind of trick, applying makeup to deceive me. But then again, I can't shake the feeling that I might be losing my grip on reality. I can't let that happen.

I keep finding myself stealing glances in Azeeza's direction, unable to shake the image of her from my mind. It is maddening. I need to regain control, to push her out of my thoughts and reassert my indifference. But as the days wore on, I couldn't deny the growing turmoil within me.

~~~

THE WEEKENDS. A sanctuary of peace and solitude, my haven from the chaos of the world. It's the only time I can escape the constant noise and demands of others. My parents, Idris and Iman, always seem to have pressing engagements that take them away on weekends. Asmah, my older sister, is dedicated to her work at the hospital, often not returning until late in the evening. Sadiya, my younger sister, is lost in the world of her phone, oblivious to everything else around her. It's as if I'm the only one who craves the stillness, the only one who seeks solace in the quiet.

But lately, something has disrupted this delicate balance. AZEEZA, the thorn in my side, has managed to infiltrate my sanctuary. Her presence, once a mere annoyance, now lingers in the corners of my thoughts, refusing to be ignored. It's infuriating, how she manages to disrupt my carefully constructed world without even trying. I've always prided myself on my ability to keep others at arm's length, to maintain my distance and independence. Yet, Azeeza's mere existence seems to challenge that resolve, threatening to pull me down from the pedestal I've placed myself upon.

I slump on the couch, an unfamiliar feeling of restlessness gnawing at me. Boredom, a word I never thought would apply to me, yet here I am, feeling it acutely.

My mind drifts to the days at school, a time when mischief and making Azeeza cry were my main preoccupations. But that's changed now. I can't bring myself to inflict pain on her anymore, and the guilt that washes over me at the mere thought is suffocating. I don't understand why, but something in me has shifted, softened. It's a disconcerting realization, one I'm not sure how to reconcile.

I dial Abdul-Hakeem, my closest friend, seeking some form of distraction, only to learn that he and his mother are being coerced into attending his father's boss's birthday party.

“Have fun.” I mutter, ending the call abruptly. Before I can contemplate my next move, two idiots came flying into my living room, their boisterous presence disrupting the fragile peace I've managed to carve out for myself.

“The fun has arrived!!” Shushitt, who actually goes by Shuraym Shittu, announces with his usual exuberance.

If you ask me why he merge both his name and his surname to create that stupid, ridiculous name, Shushitt, then we both might be left Wondering.