in all honesty - she wants to cling to haewon, to stay by her side no matter what - but she knows that is impossible.
---
august 4 is when jinsol meets haewon.
they become friends almost immediately - it just feels right, somehow. the two are both loud and energetic and funny and they're perfect for each other.
their hugs last a little too long, they share glances with each other, they hold hands under the table. but no one ever questions them. after all, that's normal, isn't it?
they're just friends, anyway.
...
october 7, when haewon tells her "i love you" for the first time.
it slips from her mouth so casually, but it still manages to make jinsol's heart skip a beat.
"i love you too," she says, and hopes haewon doesn't notice the shakiness of her voice.
...
december 15, when jinsol starts to wonder, what are we?
they're not lovers. and yet - they're not exactly friends either.
more like something in between.
she thinks about all the times haewon has wrapped her arms around her waist, all the times they've held hands, all the times haewon has promised that she would stay - and immediately wishes she hadn't.
...
january 8.
haewon's starting to like someone, and jinsol isn't pleased.
like me instead, she thinks. but she doesn't voice that thought.
she teases haewon about her crush, trying to ignore the painful squeezing of her heart.
...
march 25.
they are growing apart, slowly but surely. as much as jinsol wants to deny it, she can't.
they don't hug anymore, they don't hold hands anymore, they don't share glances anymore. they barely even talk anymore, only doing so when they need to.
and it's slowly killing her.
haewon's crush likes her back. her name is lily, jinsol learns. she's nice, she's caring, she's funny - everything jinsol wishes she could be.
haewon looks at lily the same way she used to look at jinsol and it hurts.
jinsol knows she can't change anything - even so, she wishes haewon would embrace her just once more, whisper things in her ear again - but things are different now.
it's okay, though.
as long as haewon's happy, so is she.
