Notes: This chapter will contain some Ferard explanations but you need to read it to understand the rest of the story. :)
Read with caution
Gerard's POV
I woke up next to Mikey who was staring at the wall like he was deep in thought. I shifted to signal I was awake and he turned on his back and looked over at me. "About last night, you find me attractive? As in... You have f-feelings for me?" I nodded my head unable to speak.
"So then. . . do we have something now?" His hazel eyes looked terrified as they met mine and I couldn't find a way to respond, "I need.. I need to talk to Frank today before I answer that."
Mikeys expression changed quickly, "Oh so just to make sure he doesn't want you?" He had venom in his words and I was a little panicked by it. "No no no no no, I just want to clear the water with him... To make sure he knows its over." Mikey relaxed and broke eye contact with me.
"I want you to stay home for that..." I said quietly and he just nodded. I slid out of the bed and we my room in search of my cell phone. Finding it on the floor I dialed Franks number remembering it easily and then feeling bad for knowing it right away.
Phone conversation:
Frank: Hello?
Gerard: Hey.. Can we um meet up at the park or something I need to talk to you..
Frank: How about you just come over to my apartment because there's a lot I need to say to you too.
Gerard: Okay, see you in about a hour.
Frank: Okay bye Gee.
Gerard: By Frank, I l- bye.
I quickly hung up, almost having told Frank I love him out of habit. I sighed and raked a hand through my hair and went to take a shower just pushing the thoughts back for the next few minutes I needed a fucking break.
Mikey's POV
I knew me and Gerard actually had a shot now and I should really be overjoyed but I wasn't. I didn't want him to go talk to Frank alone. What if they planned something behind my back? Like there own secret relationship? I know Gerard isn't that kind of guy but I didn't feel like being realistic right now, I wanted to be upset.
I had to push my dramatic thoughts away for now and go to clear my own water. Three months ago I was at a party with an old friend and I met this guy named Andy. He was beautiful and he was so nice to me, yet he knew how to have a good time. I instantly wanted to be around him all the time and felt like I could easily spend the rest of my life on cloud nine with him. Everything was perfect, two months of cuddles, kisses, promises, and the sweetest romance ever. It left a fluttery sweet taste in my mouth, and then made my stomach feel bitter when Andy and I would have to separate, even for a little while.
I was head over heels and we were both extraordinarily happy together and I thought he was genuinely stable and happy however he was in a very bad spot. It started with him nervously pulling his hair when we would disagree or argue. Then he was having night terrors and random panic attacks. It escalated to me finding cuts and burn marks all over him. I tried to talk to him, I tried to fix him but I didn't know what pieces he was missing.
It got to the point where if I even looked at him he'd start crying so I asked, and he looked up at me with blue and watery eyes and said, "You've been starving yourself... Please eat."
At the time I wasn't eating correctly but I didn't want to cave for him and I told him that. "Then get out. Because I refuse to deal with it." And I was so hurt because I had stood there while he screamed and broke down and smoked way to much but he wasn't willing to help me even if I wanted help.
Since I left that day he's texted me multiple times asking to talk and today I'd grant him that.
Phone conversation:
Andy: Mikey? Dear god are you alright? Please don't hang up.
Mikey: Andy will you come by today? Or can we meet up?
Andy: come to my place, are you alright?
Mikey: yeah, I'm fine I just need to talk some stuff out with you.
Andy: That's perfectly fine with me I'm ready when you are.
Mikey: I'll be there soon.
Andy: okay. Bye, I can't wait to see you.
Mikey: I uh.. Yeah. Bye.
