The Kids Screaming Oliolioxenfree [Editing]

Remember It Later. (Ch.23)

"Dear Daddy I've got a lot to say. Dear Daddy I can't wait another day. I have to get this off my chest so I can move on. All I could think to do was write and sing a song. So here it goes.

I don't want to wait 'til I'm sixteen, so you can't yell at me. I don't want to be twenty-three when I finally say these things. So here it goes. There's a lot to know.

When I grow up, I don't want to go to college. I want to be famous in my music. And I don't want to wait forever til' the day I finally lose it. And when I fall in love, I plummet to the ground. And usually when I do, I can't stick around. Last time I did, I threw knives at a chapel. And vandalized animal stables. My paranoia gets the best of me some times. And I think that lyrics need to rhyme.

Dear Daddy, I know I missed your call. Dear Daddy, but I'm. not sorry at all. Dear Daddy, there's more for you to know. So here it goes.

I've been diagnosed with chronic depression. They say the cause it's childhood recollections. I used to hurt myself. But then I made a YouTube account. My band and I post on it. We recently got ten thousand hits. I'm singer in a band called the strays. And listen when I say, if you call the cops, over the next thing I say, I'll never come back another day. But I'm the founder of a group. We have many different names. Do it now, remember later. That's our game. We do what we want to. We get in trouble a lot. I have many different anxieties. But the group has helped with that. We've mapped out all of PH. Into six sections, how 'bout that?

Dear Daddy so much more I could say. But Dear Daddy I'll save it for another day.", I sang as I played on my guitar, which I had named Oliver.

Everyone applauded as our expressos wore off. It was creeping up on five AM. We were all still alert but growing groggy. Kellin and Justin were the only two members of their band that were awake. Probably because we'd given them each a red bull and a White Special Addition Monster. They clapped as well.

"You've got something.", Kellin said.

"I mean I'm in a band. We're called the strays. But it's whatever.", I said as I began to play Heroine.

That was when my alarm went off. It was to wake me up for school. The song that played was Better Off Dead. I quickly turned it off, making it obvious that I was shaken up.

"What's wrong?", Kellin asked sounding hurt.

"Nothing. I love the song, it just brings back the past and its triggering and my therapist told me that I shouldn't listen to songs that literally describe who I am when I'm depressed. So...yeah.", I said quickly.

"Oh...", He said nodding and looking at the pavement. Was that guilt in his eyes?

"Can I show you something?", I asked. He nodded. I got on my knees and scooted closer to him. I lifted my hoodie and my muscle cut tank top, revealing a grey and black sports bra and three, adequately sized, words on my right side. Written in white, plain font. The words,"better off dead.", In a column.

"It's my second sleeping with sirens tattoo.", I explained. I showed him the one on my wrist, written in black, that says,"we are the strays." He nodded in disbelief.

"I'm getting another come April. My mom took me to get these when I got out of depression. Pierce the veil and Sleeping with sirens were the only bands I listened to. I have two SWS tattoos and two PTV tattoos.", He looked at me astonished. I showed him the one written in white on the inside of my bicep that said, "what if I was just a painter, painting houses for the rich old folk? Would you leave me for some one who deserves you more?" Then I showed him the one on the inside of my forearm that says, "the future is just a few heart beats away from disaster", in white ink.