The Kids Screaming Oliolioxenfree [Editing]

Resurfaced Memories.

What the hell am I supposed to do? I have no place to go. But still I run, aimlessly, on the side walk. I stopped when I realized that I'd run five blocks west and had ended up right in front of the apartment building I met Chelsea in. I had no where else to go so I went inside.

Upon going up to the lobby I saw Chelsea. She didn't see me at first but once she did, she looked shocked. Her expression faded slowly as it melted into one of understanding. She walked up to me and pulled my hand away from my wrist, which it was subconsciously scratching at.

"Are you okay?", she asked, slouching down so she was eye level.

"Yeah.", I replied, knowing fully well what she meant.

"Stop scratching.", she said, as I began to scratch, subconsciously, at the wrist that she held tightly in her hand. "I have an idea!", she exclaimed. "Let's go get tattoos!"

____

The tattoo parlor smelled of burning flesh. Don't ask me why. It just did. I walked in and Chelsea went straight up to the front desk.

"I need an earliest Indian appointment you have."

"Umm let me see...", the receptionist looked down into a sign in log. "Actually he's open right now. You can go ahead to the room in the back.", she said, pointing in the direction of the room.

Once we were beyond hearing distance I turned to chelsea.
"Indian appointment?"

"Indian ink. It's like a tattoo. Just with Indian ink. If you get a good one it stays on for 1-3 years.", she explained.

"O-okay.", I stuttered out.

"So! What do you want?", she asked when we entered the room.

"I'm thinking a rose. On my wrist.", she looked at me, skeptically, and then glanced at my wrist, examining the variety of welts that lay in the skin. She looked as though she was deep in thought.

"Okay.", she said, cheerfully once she'd broken out of whatever trance she was in.

"Hey guys! Listen, they need this room for some one else so why don't you guys come out here and we'll set up in one of the chairs.", Jamie said, happily.

We followed him out and I was immediately surrounded by an air of confidence. These people were all wearing PTV, BMTH, Beartooth, and Barrier band-shirts. Even the artists were wearing Metallica and heavy metal band shirts and tank tops. They all looked and smiled at me. Except for he artists of course.

"Hey bring her over here.", a Greek looking, artist called out at Jamie. He smiled and we walked over to the man. "You new?", he asked. I nodded.

"This is Kat.", Jamie explained,"I've told you of her." He then looked at us. "This is Nick. My ever so beautiful Greak boyfriend.", I laughed at that. He then motioned towards the small boy in the chair. "And this is one of Nick's good friends, Adrian." My eyes went wide and they all noticed but I didn't really care. I was lost in the ever so charismatic eyes of Adrian Aryel. His eyes were huge and glistening. I was jarred from my thoughts by a hand on my side, dragging me to the chair to the right of Adrian's. I sat down and looked at him. He had looked away and was choking back silent tears. The chairs were surprisingly close to each other allowing me to subconsciously put my hand on Adrian's. Once I realized what I was doing I was going to take my hand away, but under my hand he flipped and laced his fingers with mine, squeezing them tightly. I let them stay that way. This was ripping him apart and it was visible.

I saw that Adrian was getting a black and white rose on his wrist. Jamie must have realized that I was staring so he told me that it was an Indian tattoo. I nodded. Nick kept glancing up at me, a vicious look on his face. Jamie must have noticed because he said something in Spanish to Nick. It sounded like he was scolding him. He just murmured something inaudible and stopped looking at me.

____

That. Was. Excruciating. Jamie was very talented, (I made sure of that), and sweet. But he didn't sugar coat it. He told me how bad it was going to hurt and I should've believed him. Adrian left before I did. He seemed sort of cold. But a reluctant sort of cold. Once we left the tattoo parlor we stopped by Ritters, a frozen custard shop. After getting salted caramel ice cream we headed home, stopping at the gas station for Monsters, Peace Tea, and gummy bears. Once we got home we sat on the couch, put a thick comforter over us, and turned the TV on.

"So, how do you like your tattoo?", she asked when the commercials came on, probably noticing that I wouldn't stop looking at it.

"I want another one.", I said before thinking.

"One at a time. In four weeks I'll take you to get another."

"That Jamie said they heal in 6-8 weeks."

"Yeah but it should be better in four. What else do you want?"

"This.", I said, showing her a picture of Kellin Quinn's wrist tattoo of a music note.

"Before I'd moved to where I live now. I tried to kill myself. While listening to Kellin Quinn's song Low. When the chorus came I slit my wrists. Only to find the next morning that I didn't go deep enough. The thing is. He's not what made me think it was okay, to like, try and kill myself. He's the reason I am okay. After I tried to kill myself, a couple weeks later, I went to his concert because I had tickets. He sang that song with such passion and I started crying. Thank god Christine was there. But after he played that songs he said something that I will never forget. 'Listen, that was a love song. But I know that some of you feel low for other reasons. And some of you take it out on yourselves. And if you do I want you to look at me. Dead in the eyes. I would rather slit my wrists than see you cry.' He looked directly at me and didn't look any where else. Probably because I was crying. The last thing he said before he played the next song was,' You're all worth so much. No matter what. Remember that.' And I did.", I finished. She looked like she was about to cry so I smiled. She hugged me and our show came back on.

____

"Okay I have to go, Adrian."

"Okay I love you."

"Bye.", I said before hanging up. It was a panicked thing but as soon as I hung up I regretted it. I redialed his number and the phone rang three times before he picked up.

"By the way. I'm leaving the band.", he said bluntly.

"Yeah I am too but that's not why I called -"

"I mean we just weren't making any music. And I'm not joining another band."

"Okay. Adrian I just wa-"

"I was going to but to be honest it wouldn't be the same without a killer voice like yours. I really miss you."

"Adrian I lov-", and then he hung up.

I immediately sunk to my knees and cried. I can't leave him again. I have to go back. I can't do this again. But he doesn't want me. I know he doesn't. He wants nothing to do with me. I wouldn't blame him. I screwed up. Big time.

I grabbed the keys to Chelsea's mustang, a monster, my wallet, and left. And where did I go? Fucking Johnnie's place.

___

"What do you want?", he slurred from the door.

"Pills. Morphine. Vicodin. One of the two."

"Come on in.", he said with a mischievous grin.

I walked in and was slapped in the face by a thick layer of marijuana smoke. I coughed a few times and he led me to the kitchen. He quickly rifled through a cabinet and grabbed a bottle. He neared towards me only to yank it back when I reached for it.

"It's full. 65."

"Fuck no! 40."

"60."

"45."

"50."

"Done." He handed me the bottle and I handed him $50 and left.

(A/N I know this is short. It's a cliff hanger. This had to happen for the next thing to happen. Hope you liked this chapter. Stay beautiful cx)