This is the kind of poems you all want to read,
A story of a little girl, a teenage, a young lady and a woman;
Aspiring to be liberated from an inherited mind ;
A mind full of stories and patterns that the brain refuses to swallow;
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This is t...
Words that are crafted by the mind, heard by the heart and implimented by the body
How to have a crystal clear mind, where I can see that one plus one is always two and that my instinct feeling is always true
I want to say no without crippling the worlds inside of me
I want to say Yes with a smile on my face
The habit of being afraid of my own decisions is torturing me
And the urge of I have to be right, direct and speak always clearly, is breaking me
For so many reasons I can't seem to end the inside wars
And am always feeding my own delusional mind to convince myself that my indecisiveness is just a way to not hurting the heart and the mind
And I am afraid of hurting others and be hurt as a consequence at the end
Because karma, am afraid will Bite me for sure
But it seems like my mind Is done using all these reasons and fears as excuses
Its wheels became unconftional and always leaking out the firm decisions it crafts but never been used or trusted to be true and right!
What to do now!
Confusing is always filling my mind's cups
pushing me to the edge of hate and rage
And taking me to places where I always end up blaming myself for not moving forward with the crafted words
It is a maze I seem to never escape
Because Each time I try to combine and put together the elements, I am faced with guilt
I pray what to do to find strength, have faith and train my mind's wheels again
I want to hold on unto my decisions and never let trust fade away
I pray where to find firmness seeds because firm? I need to be and always stay
And truce between the heart and the mind I need to achieve
I know it is hard to form a habit of decisiveness
But trying is the only option I have left
Otherwise I am risking my mind to blow away and into confetti it will turn
And my soul will never beams or embody its truest self!
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May you find trust and have faith in yourself, indecision is a decision too, just be gentle and if your peace is at risk then the decision must be choosing yourself 🤍
