Dedicated to MajenBeos02, Babyalex34, Cvstina
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Four years and seven months ago, Camile, age 17
September 3, 2014, 7:03 pm, Camile's POV
'A bed of roses, the thorns pricking against my skin, a happy giggle somewhere far off. I sink into the feeling and inhale deeply, devoid of crushing pain. My eyes are wide open, but I do not see the ceiling. I see the open sky and hear the soft voices of boys arguing far off. Here, there, that is where I belong, where I need to get back to.'
'The quiet of the room lets my ears pick up the soft, girlish voice speaking to me. My heartbeat thuds in my ears, knowing how close I am to the constraint of time. Time is flying out of my hands faster and faster, like a bullet fired from a gun. Like a roll of ribbon unraveling toward the pull of gravity. I don't fight the urge. The waves of exhaustion promise rest if I just hold this peace a little longer. A long peace with no more pain...'
'Then a loud beeping snatches me back, and coming up from the quiet is agony—my chest constricts, and I can't breathe through the excruciating pain. I snarl, and my eyes focus on the room blurry, coming into focus. Inside, I'm screaming 'NO,' enraged that someone took that peace from me. Someone forced me to endure more. Who would dare? Who decided to interfere?! There was an ironclad DO NOT RESUSCITATE!'
"Are you alright!" A panicked voice asks, and then they do something truly disgusting: they touch me. I fist my hands and force my body to move despite how weak my limbs are, and I snatch a shirt collar and yank it to me.
"What the fuck did you do!?" I yell into their face, and their round hazel eyes fill with tears. I rev up, ready to drag more pain from them, but the urge hesitates when they sniffle. I draw them closer, blaming them for the confusion going through me.
"Huh? What did you do!" I say and shake them a little, and they blink once, and two tears track down their cheeks, and I push them away from me when the agony washes back over me, making me physically sick. I try to grab the empty tub, but my shaking hands only hit the rim. The boy moves immediately, grabs it, and sets it in my lap the second I begin vomiting. I again demand they leave between the revolting spray, but as if he can't understand me, he remains.
"It's okay." He tries when my body arches to a painful bend as I vomit so hard I feel my own eyes well up with tears. I cough and turn away from the mess in the bucket. The boy hurries over and starts removing it, and I glare at him hatefully as he does. He nods to me as if silently inquiring if I am done being sick. I jerk my head up, and he leaves the room quickly before returning before I can think of relaxing. I open my mouth to throw him out verbally, but he hurries toward me with tissues, Listerine, a paper cup, and wet wipes. I eye him, and his hands tremble as he sets them on the bed tray and then leaves before I can address him again. I use them with a dark look at the doorway. Then rage swamps me yet again when my spasming hands splash Listerine all over my bed.
The hospital room lights glare down at me, and the rage building in me needs a place to go. I lay on my back and yell out my fury as I desperately try to yank the padded hospital cuffs off my forearms. There is no form in this struggle. My fleeting control brings it on.'
'I ended up here when, without warning, the switch in my brain flipped. Adrenaline pumped so hard I took it out on an informant who gave faulty information, attributing it to anger. Until it built and built and fogged my vision. I knew enough to pull onto the shoulder, press the retrieval button, and tie the handcuffs myself. I never remember what comes next. I end up here, told I lost it, and then lost time. That I went catatonic for hours or days. I glance out the window. It is raining. It wasn't meant to rain until next week. This was a days one, days where I was only here physically. Days where death brushed close but lost time in and time again.'
YOU ARE READING
Singing Robin (Part 2)
General FictionThis is the Second Book after Wilting Violets We have new names, roles, and rules. Pieces of an old puzzle but not a board to fit them on, and we are working differently than before. For the first time, the Monsters that sit below our skin are allow...
