See you then (engl)

The Reason

It was late in the evening and there were four of us in the car. Sam, Lilith, Gabriel and me.
Since Cas disappeared without a trace a few days ago, I haven't slept a bit. This time it was different.
He didn't leave, he disappeared. Everything happened so quickly, shortly after we talked in the forest we went back to camp. But when I turned around, no one was there anymore, the traces of blood showed me that he hadn't left. So we sat here, driving to our last chance to find out something.
Bobby.
Bobby was the closest thing to a father figure we had, he always helped us and didn't give up.

"Explain that to me again"
I explained to him again that when I turned around Cas was already gone. We started looking but we didn't find anything. Then I got the call, I sprinted to my cell phone and answered it. "Dean, 10 p.m. at the old church"
That was it, I couldn't answer anything, just do what was said.
Sam, Gabriel and I left Lilith with Bobby, he wished us good luck.
It was a slightly longer route because it was the church near our bunker, there was no old church near Bobbys.
We were a little early and I couldn't stop running back and forth, it was driving me crazy

Our lights flickered, the wind made the trees roar and suddenly there were some silhouettes standing in front of us.
"Hello Dean."
It was too dark to see anything, I squinted my eyes to try and see but I couldn't.
"Who are you?" I almost screamed,
I couldn't take it anymore. It was like a bad bad Movie.
One of the figures came forward and smiled at me in a very creepy way, his eyes were black.
I jumped back and looked for Sam and Gabriel around. The two of them looked at least as scared as I was.
"Dean Winchester", he stepped closer and closer. "What do you want from me?"
"I heard you're a really nice guy," he started laughing.
"So young and so naive, unfortunately I can't leave it like that, I hope you understand that" That was probably some kind of bad joke, why was I even here? I turned around so I could leave. But this man, who had normal eyes again, suddenly stood there.
"I thought you wanted to see your Castiel again" Startled, I looked up, he just smiled again and pointed to something behind me.
So I turned around and saw the others Figures slowly came into the foreground.
I saw Cas with his hands tied back and duct tape over his mouth. But I saw his eyes, they were full of fear. The other figure laughed too. I no longer understood the world, it was all too much for me. What the hell was happening here?
"This was actually supposed to be a gift for dear Gabriel, but it's much funnier this way"
I wanted to confront Gabriel, but I couldn't turn, I had to keep my eyes on Cas. He could barely stand, but this man wouldn't let go of him.
I just stood there, I couldn't move. One man was behind me, the other was standing in front of me with Cas. I wanted to get out of here.
"Let him go and take me." I turned to Gabriel,
his eyes full of anger.
"Gabriel, do you know them?"
and as I said that, I walked towards him.
He backed away and nodded slightly.
"Him or Mom"
I stopped abruptly
"What?"
"After an accident, both our mother and Castiel were in the hospital. It didn't look good, so I went for a walk. The two came to me and told me they could help, but I had to make a decision. Either him or Mom. I knew I would lose both, so I had to choose. I chose Mom, Castiel is my little brother, he had his whole life ahead of him. And I knew she wouldn't have been angry. It happened very quickly, there were just a few things I didn't know. That the two of them were something supernatural and that it changed Castiel forever. Since then he hasn't spoken anymore, he was there, but only present. However, I didn't tell him the truth, he thought it was the doctors' fault"

He couldn't look me in the eyes, but I understood. I would have chosen Sammy too. "Awh, that's really cute, but the fun is over. You know, we don't keep our promises."
He tore the tape off his mouth. I started to run towards him, but I was pulled back.
Sam noticed something I didn't see.
There were more at the back, many, many more. I looked at Cas, he also looked at me.
"Live your life, Dean. See you then," very weak and quiet words came out of his mouth.
I immediately ran, but this something was faster.
Cas held his breath, it was taken away from him. A stare, something was wrong, something was really wrong. Blood ran from his mouth and he collapsed to the ground.
His look, his seemingly last look, full of fear. Then I saw it.
His heart in his hand.
He literally ripped his heart out.
I bent down to reach Castiel, it wasn't a nightmare. It was real. Pure reality.
I knelt and pulled Cas up to me.
I stared at where the men were just standing.
It was like cotton, everything around me faded and, like I was covered in cotton.
Gabriel and Sam screamed and ran to us.

And here I sit now, alone in my room.
Each hunter had their own personal story that made them a hunter.
That was my story. I put the pen aside and closed the book. My hunter friends advised me to write my story. It had already been a few months, I was trying to live as he told me.
That was supposed to help me process it, but nothing changed.
But he's here, he's in all the colorful leaves in autumn, in all the blooming flowers in spring and in all the sunshine in summer. Everywhere and yet nowhere. yes cas, I promised you that I would be there, that we would make it. One day I'll wake up and have forgotten your favorite things. I will die in the universe where you loved me.
I know it now.
And that's the end of the story that never really began.
In another life I will have the chance to do better.

See you then, cas.