ՏTᗴᑭ ᗷᖇOTᕼᗴᖇ

Chapter 35

Jin's POV

Dads shoulders relax and he takes Aera in his arms. He extends his hand to Namjoon as an offer of apology.

"I'm sorry Namjoon, I shouldn't have come in here like that. One day you'll have a little boy of your own and you'll understand why but it doesn't make it right."

I can't even bring myself to look at him. My heart can't take much more.

I hear Namjoon answer Dad as I turn and enter the hallway.

"He's special. It's okay, you needed to protect him."

I see Jungkook walk out of his room. His eyes still not open completely as he wraps his arms around me.

"Jin, Am I your brother too?" he asks in a voice so pure I want to wrap his tiny body in cotton wool and hide him away to protect that innocence forever.

I smile. "You already were." And I kiss the top of his head.

He takes my hand and we walk to the kitchen for breakfast.

*********

Dad enters my room and stands against the window looking down at me but doesn't say anything.

"Dad you're hovering, you never hover. What's wrong?"

Dad rubs the back of his neck and starts to pace anxiously. This is very much not his normal behaviour. Finally he stops and sits on the end of my bed. I twist in my chair to face him.

"Okay first I want to apologise for earlier. I handled the situation horribly. Even if you and Namjoon had.. you know. I still shouldn't have acted like that. Its a normal and completely natural thing to happen between two people and I don't want you to feel... What's the word?.. Slut-shamed."

I burst out in hysterical laughter. I can't believe those words just came out of my father.

"Dad. Have you been reading one of those 'how to talk to your teen' books or something? How do you even know those words?"

He looks everywhere in my room except at me.

"Aera showed me an article in one of her magazines. It made me realise we have never had.. you know.. a chat about these things so.."

Oh god no. Please no. I cannot have the sex talk with my father right now.

"Jin when two people care about each other very much and want to SAFELY express that love they-"

"Ah dad! Please stop! Look mum beat you to this year's ago and anything she didn't tell me Hobi filled in the blanks so seriously there is no need. I'm good."

Dads face lit up at the realisation no one had defiled his son yet and he took it as his cue to relax. If he realised the only guy I've ever wanted inside of me slept on the other side of my door he might not be so chilled.

"Okay. Good. Great. So me and Aera have been talking about how out of hand things got earlier and we think maybe we need to spend more time as a family. Do you have any tests or homework due in today?"

"No, why?"

"Want to ditch? Aera is going to get some barbecue stuff in and we can go in the pool and watch old movies all day? Jungkook's already home anyway and Namjoon's head is still killing him so.. what do you think?"

I was elated that I could avoid Yoongi for another 24 hours but I desperately needed a buffer between me and Namjoon.

"Sounds amazing, Hobi is off today too getting Granny to some appointments, can I ask him to come?" He was family too, I knew he wouldn't say no.

"If Granny says it's okay then of course he's welcome."

I ring Hobi and he seems so happy to come see me but I know deep down he just wants to see the pool.

Speaking of pool. I search around in my closet but can't find a single swimming costume. I know I had some at the house.

I grab my gym bag from last year I get out the black one piece I wore for diving. It was completely unflattering and showed no skin but it did the job.

I made it downstairs just as the doorbell rang. I opened the door to see a ball of sunshine running towards me.

"Wow! This place is huge!" He shouts as he twirls around staring at the high ceilings.

"Taehyung punched Kai in the throat so he's suspended for three days. Granny forgot to tell me so I went to take him in this morning and they refused to take the little shit." Hobi complained as he wandered into the house and dumped his bags on the sofa.

"He said I was the ugliest boy in the world! I told him he must be blind because I'm perfect then he pushed me off the climbing frame! I had to punch him. I had no choice." Tae spoke with absolute conviction.

I loved the way his little mind worked. He honestly saw nothing wrong in what he did and I couldn't help but envy the way he could always find a way to justify his actions.

"Tae. Behave today or I'll take you straight home!" Hobi scolded his little brother but the walking pool of attitude just stuck his tongue out in return.

"I've got a few hours until I've got to go get Granny back. Where's this pool you keep speaking of?" He grinned.

I took them through the house, Tae's mouth just hung open the whole time. We went into the back yard where Aera and Dad were having coffee.

"Uncle Hyunjin!" Tae screamed whilst hurling himself into my dad's lap.

Aera's smile faltered slightly as she looked at Tae. She seemed to be examining his face intensely.

"You been behaving pudding?" Dad asks tickling Tae so much he squeals.

"Nope!" He answers honestly between giggles.

Jungkook popped out from the pool house all ready in his bathing suit.

"Jin are you coming in? Namjoon blew up the inflatables for me but he hasn't come back down yet and I'm not allowed to go in on my own." He spotted Tae still sitting on dad's lap and helping himself to some strawberries.

"Hello, I'm Jungkook. Nice to meet you." He says very formally and extended his hand to Tae. He looked from his hand to Hyunjin.

"Why does he talk like he's old?" He asked. Dad burst out laughing and even Aera's smile returned.

"Hoseok why don't you and Tae go change in the downstairs cloakroom, it's the door next to the laundry room" Aera points towards the door.

"No need." Tae says and jumps off dad whipping his dress off and throwing it on the floor to leave him in his bathing suit. "I'm ready!" He starts running towards the pool doors.

I pick his dress up and put it on the chair. "I've got him, you go get changed." I chase after Tae before he can get in anymore trouble.

I hadn't used the pool yet. It was bigger than I thought it would be, there were white plush loungers along the side where I lay my clothes and shoes.

I watch as Jungkook cannonballs into the water soaking the floor around me. Tae decides to copy and I watch as they begin a war of who can splash the other more.

"Enough you two! The whole place is dripping!"

"Leave them have their fun. Weren't you ever a kid?" The voice comes from behind me. The low pitch makes my knees want to buckle. I look behind and see Namjoon walking to one of the loungers in a pair of blue board shorts. They're hang so low on his hips you can see the V carved into the space above them.

His abs glisten with a gentle layer of sweat and I can see every muscle in his body is tight. He's definitely just come from a work out. He looks bigger if that's at all possible.

I look down at my one piece that covers so much of me. Why don't I just get virgin stamped on my forehead?

Namjoon lays down and starts scrolling through his phone. I step into the pool and get hit in the face with a giant inflatable beach ball.

"Sorry Jin!" Shouts Jungkook, I throw it back to him so he and Tae can continue their game.

The water is soothing. I didn't realise how tense I was but I allow myself to float weightless for a while and enjoy the serenity that water always brings me.

I notice Namjoon out of the corner of my eye. He's got his phone in front of his face but he's looking directly at the door.

I look to the door way and see what he's staring at.

Hobi's long legs in a pair of wedged sandals that only made them look longer and his perfect body completely on display barely covered in shorts.

He lowers himself into the water and I saw Namjoon who is still fucking gawking at him.

I mean I can't blame him, but that doesn't make me want to punch him in his stupid open mouth any less.

"Tae been good?" He asks completely unaware that his natural aura is pissing me off.

"Yeah." I answer sharply.

He looks at me puzzled by my sharp change of attitude but doesn't push me, choosing instead to swim over to Tae and make a game of piggy in the middle with Jungkook.

I swim to the edge of the pool and give myself a second to breathe. I need to stop this.

I see Namjoon get up and walk over to where they are, he jumps in next to Jungkook and grabs him throwing him backwards over his shoulder into the water.

"Do me! Do me!" Tae practically shakes with excitement as Namjoon reaches into the water and throws him over him letting his land slightly gentler than he did with Jungkook.

He barely has time to recover before Tae latches onto him and tries to climb him like a tree to get another go. Namjoon and Hobi laugh at the little spider monkey that claws his way into his arms.

Jungkook asks Hobi to play ball with him and I watch as the four of them all laugh and play together.

They look like a little family from a magazine. So perfect.

I look down at myself and realise how much I don't fit in here. I'm not like them, I could never be perfect like that.

This goes on for a while, they basically forget I'm here as I watch them.

I hear Namjoon ask if they want to go in the Jacuzzi that sits attached to the corner of the pool.

The kids scramble to get out and jump into the bubbles. Namjoon walks up the stairs but Hobi just grabs hold of the wall and uses his upper body strength to pull himself up and swing himself in.

I can see Namjoon is impressed. If I did that I would definitely slip, smack my face and probably end up in the emergency room with a broken nose.

"You got some core strength in you." He remarks as he lowers himself into the bubbly water. I edge closer towards them so I can hear what they're saying.

"Dance." He replies. "Never doubt a dancer's strength or stamina."

Typical Hobi response.

"I can see. I bet you're good. Tell me the next time you have a show. I want to see for myself." I look at him but he's looking directly into his eyes and biting at the end of his thumb.

He's flirting with him. That fucker is flirting with him right here in front of me.

I hate this. I hate him. I hate these fucking feelings.

I can't take this anymore, I can't watch him be like that with another person right in front of me.

I pull myself from the pool, nowhere near as gracefully as Hobi, and run for the showers.

"Jin?!" I hear from behind me but I don't stop.

I sit in the shower and just let the water saturate my body. I promised myself I would never let Namjoon make me cry again but this was making it very hard.

I strip out of my bathing suit and wrap a big fluffy towel around myself.

I sit on the bench naked, vulnerable and alone. The tears finally defeat me as they pour slowly from my eyes.

"Jin? What's wrong?" I didn't hear him come in.

Hobi sits down beside me on the bench and turns my tear soaked face to him.

I can't hold all this in anymore.

"Hobi I have to tell you something."