Heal me. || Riyan Parag X O/C

37 ➵The letter not sent

The house was silent again.

Dhruv had left a few minutes ago, after giving Riyan a tight hug and whispering,

"Tu akela nahi hai, samjha? Koi bhi cheez ki zarurat hogi … kabhi bhi… bas mujhe call kar dena."

Riyan had only nodded, his throat too tight to respond.

Now, he was alone.

Alone in a house that still smelled like her. That still had her clothes in the wardrobe, her books stacked haphazardly on the bedside table, her handwriting on the little sticky notes she used to leave everywhere.

And now, he had one more piece of her.

A letter.

Her last letter to him.

His fingers hovered over the envelope, his pulse roaring in his ears. He wasn’t sure he could do this. Wasn’t sure if he was ready to read words she had written, knowing there would never be another.

But it was her.

And if this was all he had left, he wasn’t going to waste another second.

Swallowing hard, he carefully tore open the envelope, his hands trembling as he unfolded the paper.

Her handwriting stared back at him—familiar, warm, a little messy in some places where she had probably been too excited to write neatly.

"My Ri,"

His breath hitched.

His vision blurred, but he blinked the tears away. Not yet.

Not before he read every word.

And so, with a deep, shaky breath, he began to read.

My Ri

Happy anniversary, well technically it's our dating anniversary but hey more to celebrate right?

It’s funny, isn’t it? How time flies when you’re with the right person. It feels like just yesterday when we had our first real fight over which biryani place was better, and now, here we are—another year, another milestone, another chapter in our story.

You always tease me for being extra about these things, but I don’t care. Because loving you is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever done, and if that makes me dramatic, toh phir main duniya ki sabse badi drama queen banna pasand karungi.

Riyan, tum jaante bhi ho tum mere liye kya ho?

Tum meri subah ki pehli chai ho, jiski aadat mujhe kab ka chhod deni chahiye thi, par ho nahi paata. Tum wo baarish ho jo achanak se girti hai aur mujhe bina kisi wajah ke smile karne pe majboor kar deti hai. Tum meri woh kahani ho jo main baar-baar padhna chahti hoon, baar-baar jeena chahti hoon. You know sort of like Harry Potter but better.

Aur sabse zyada, you are my home, Ri.

Jab bhi duniya mujhe thoda zyada chaotic lagti hai, jab bhi mujhe lagta hai ki sab kuch toot raha hai, sirf ek tum ho jo mujhe sambhalte ho. Sirf ek tum ho jo mujhe samajhte ho bina kisi explanation ke.

Mujhe yaad hai ek baar tumne kaha tha ki tumhe na, ek noisy house chahiye—jismein humare bachon ki hasne-roni ki awaaz ho, jahaan roz subah bed pe pillows bikharay honge kyunki tumhara alarm band karne ka tareeka thoda alag hota hai, aur jahaan raat ko hum sirf iss baat pe ladenge ki TV pe cricket lagega ya koi romcom.

Riyan, main wo sab chahti hu

Main chahti hu ki humari ek home ho. Ek chhoti si duniya, sirf tumhari aur meri. Jahaan har subah tum mujhe apni tang karne wali awaaz mein ‘utho na bunny, kitna soyegi?’ kehke jagaoge. Jahaan har shaam main tumhari practice ke baad tumhari ,what you like to call , "sweaty hug"  se door bhaagti phirun aur tum mujhe hamesha pakad hi loge

Main wo saari cheezein chahti hu ,  Riyan. Par sabse zyada, main tumhe chahti hu.

I love you Ri , forevermore

Yours
Bunny

Riyan sat on the floor, the letter clutched in his trembling hands. His breath was uneven, his chest rising and falling rapidly as his eyes moved over her words again and again, as if reading them one more time would somehow bring her back.

"My Ri."

A broken sob left his lips.

It sounded so normal. So casual. Like she had just written this yesterday, like she was still here, teasing him, calling him Ri in that annoyingly sweet voice that always made his heart melt.

But she wasn’t.

She wasn’t fucking here.

His fingers traced her handwriting—the slightly messy strokes of her R, the way she always curled her y at the end of her name. He could imagine her sitting on their bed, legs crossed, biting her lip in concentration as she wrote this, probably giggling to herself when she added the Harry Potter comment.

"Tum meri subah ki pehli chai ho."

"Tum wo baarish ho jo achanak se girti hai aur mujhe bina kisi wajah ke smile karne pe majboor kar deti hai."

"You are my home, Ri."

His whole body shook.

She had called him her home, and yet, she was the one who had left him homeless.

His home was gone. His Bunny was gone.

Riyan let out a shaky breath, his fingers tightening around the letter, as if holding it tighter would somehow keep her close. His vision blurred, tears spilling onto the paper, smudging the ink.

He read the last line again, whispering it like a prayer.

"I love you Ri, forevermore."

"Yours, Bunny."

A guttural cry tore through his throat as he clutched the letter to his chest, curling into himself. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, just rocking back and forth, drowning in a grief so deep it felt like he was suffocating.

Eventually, his body gave up. His tears slowed, leaving him empty, hollow.

He inhaled deeply, his gaze shifting across the room—their room.

Her pink Rajasthan Royals jersey still hung on the chair. Her teddy bear, Stella, still sat on the bedside table, wearing the stupid little cap he had put on it months ago. The polaroids on the wall, the books she left half-read, the goddamn record player—everything was still here.

Everything except her.

Riyan exhaled shakily and reached for the letter again, his fingers brushing over the words like they were sacred.

"I love you Ri, forevermore."

Forevermore.

He closed his eyes.

Maybe one day, the ache would dull. Maybe one day, he would be able to say her name without feeling like he was being ripped apart.

But today wasn’t that day.

And that was okay.

He kissed the letter, pressing it against his forehead, as if he could hold on to the last piece of her that was still his.

"I love you too, Bunny. Forevermore."