Anything but sunshine and Rainbows ( BILLY BUTCHER X READER

FUCKED UP MENTALLY

Words of concern floated around it was like she was there and not there at the same time. The faces of past swirling like a harsh tornado in her mind wondering what else was going to happen almost expecting the car to blow up just something bad or fucked up to happen. " she was alive all this time she was alive" she felt her throat constrict and tighten almost stopping the words coming out. "My mom's alive , all this time and she didn't care like her fucking possession were more important" she gritted not one of them spoke a word as she let it all come out . " they all had a part of it my uncle including like i was something to sell off" she laughed dryly . " god my life is worse then a episode of game of throne , both of your kids are fucked" she looked up at ben. " well least my grandkids aren't too bad" he gave small smiled. " oh god ryan" she gasped. " not in there guess homelander does actually care bout em" butcher said rubbing her arms he could feel the freezing temperature through the material. " so elsa huh" hughie smiled. " i didn't know i could do that but it just felt like i had this bomb in me and i explode i doubt i killed them but i hope i did". " we need to get you home and into bed you look exhausted" annie called throwing her cape back to cover her more . " yeah clothes aren't flame retardant" she mused. " i'm not complaining" butcher winked. " ok gross shit for closed doors please" hughie groaned. " we need to stop her i mean really stop her" she looked to the group. " late abortion?" ben asked. " overdue one" she seethed .

" she back with those guys" A train said as homelander dragged his now sister from the house . " back tower put her in a cell , the fuck is wrong with you" he looked to the woman. " come on you wouldn't have known" she rolled her eyes. " my niece you made me think she was going to be my fucking wife" he snapped her arm as she screamed . " it was what vought wanted i don't care what happens i don't want kids never did" she gritted through the intense burning pain. " i thought he was fucked" the deep whispered. " oh shut up fish fucker" she growled as the each headed down to the vought vans pulling up . "she's strong i've a new mission for her" he smirked throwing his sister into the van before heading off. The plan running through his mind filled his own ego with his genius . play nice , gain her trust somehow make his own version of the seven but of his supe bound family , maybe soldier boy would come aboard if she was there . oh he could see all the headlines of homelander and his family being the supes the world needs . knowing she was piss maybe he could use that vulnerability to his advantage . god he loved his smart brains and its idea's it was foolproof. If she didn't do it willingly well he could find a way around that .

The walls of the house didn't feel the same , it reminded her of shit times yet it made her sick. The man she held on a pedestal was one of them. He was going to give her over to homelander and never told her , he even took it to the grave . It was like life demolished those happy memories and words of advice . every word , conversation they ever had was on replay in her mind trying to see if she could have noticed it now . her mom was never a mom , her father pushed away , an uncle she thought was her only saviour and well now she had none of that . All those memorie were nothing more than fake lies showing she truly had no one looking out for her younger self; it was all a mask for a sick operation. Least she could count on those around her now , the ones who looked absolutely heartbroken for her. It also scared her what if this was same sort of thing , what if it was all a guise it had her mind in overdrive and system of her trust was questioned all things in her life. Maybe it was better to be alone and then no one could hurt her again or break her trust again . she was bad luck and no one could truly care for her as person . all the negativity in her veins portraying through the ice that crawled up the walls so stuck she didn't hear or notice til the arms wrapped around her holding her tightly almost showing her in sense that the thought she was no thinking were not true . holding her so tight ignoring the sting of the ice as she sobbed for the lost life . the gritted teeth while he refused to let her feel what he felt . he could see it in her when she was getting into the car . he felt all those same emotions and probably was still feeling them . " we're not them" he pulled her tighter the tips of his hair coated in the frost . " we will never be them" he continued. " why me" she asked. " why is this all happening to me what did i do to deserve all this" she cried harder. " you didn't do anything and i will make them all pay for this" he gritted trying to no let the ice feeling take over. " shit shit sorry" she went to pull back but he held her letting her know he was there regardless. " ben if i never said it before i mean it now i love you and i love that your my family" she hiccuped ice instantly melting away . " i love you too kid ... don't tell anyone i said that" he rolled his eyes playfully. " don't have any more evil kids" she sniffled. " i'll keep the demon spawn back" he chuckled.