(This is my first chapter I adivse to bring tissues, your going to need them)
Winter
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When I wake up I see Ember still asleep with her "Horsey" glued to her hands. Autumn still wonders why Ember is so intrested in horses but I know.
When I was younger my mother had a black, 24 year old Welsh pony I was besotted with. His name was "Cherish the moment" but I always called him "Cherry" or "Cheerio". My mother would let me go to him everyday and I would always help groom him and sit on his bare back. I never wanted to get off but like always I eventually had to. Cheerio was my best friend and we would fight against the world if we could. I spend hours in the field with him, laying on the grass with my back leaning against his body whilst looking up at the sky.
Then I get turned back to reality when Ember starts moving around as she is waking up. Since it is a saturday I take my time whilst taking her out of her cot and bringing her down to the kitchen. I sit her down in her chair as I start preparing breakfast.
As I am almost finnished making the pancakes I see Autumn walking down the stairs. She gies to stand behind me and plants a small kiss on my cheek as we wish eachother a good morning.
She sets up the table whilst I finnish making the pancakes and we sit to have breakfast.
We talk about a lot whilst eating and eventually the topic of horses is brought up. "I still wonder why she is so fond of horses." Autumn comments. "I know why." I mumble. I see Autumn looking up at me wuth a knowing look. "Oh fuck, I said it out loud." I think to myself. "Wait, you had something with horses?" Autumn asks me, still a bit confused.
Autumn
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"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask Winter. Instead of answering my question he grabs his empty plate and brings it to the kitchen. "Winter, don't ignore me." I say in a stern voice. He keeps quiet as he rinses his plate. "Winter Knight, tell me." I keep the stern voice. I just want him to explain to me why he never said anything. "Why did he keep it a secret that he likes horses? Its nothing to be afraid of." I think to myself. "Winter, you know you can tell me." I say to him reasuring him there is nothing to be afraid of. I want to comfirt him so I stoke his arm but he denies my comfort. "Winter!" I say as he is not listening to me. I pin him to the wall as he starts struggeling to get loose. "Autumn, stop." He says in a stern voice, he is visibly annoyed but I don't move. "Winter, please just tell me." Winter is still strugeling and trying to get away. "Darling please." I plead with him to tell me.
Winter
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"Autumn, stop this right now, please." I beg her to let me go and stop this questioning. I run away from this topic because it brings back horrible memories.
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I stood there at the vet with nothing I could do. They were going to take away Cheerio from me and all I could do was sit and cry. I couldn't bear the idea that he had to leave the world. When it happened I didn't watch. The idea of him leaving was already painful enough, seeing it actually happen would pull me to my grave.
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"Autumn, just like you don't want to talk about Shannon (This is what the gc named the siblings' mum), I don't want to talk about this." Once the words leave my mouth I am getting filled with regret about what I just said but I had to make it clear. I see the hurt in Autumn's eyes and she drops her arms and walks away. She closes herself off and goes to our room. I decide to give her a few minutes whilst I clean up the remains of breakfast.
I sit Ember behind the television so she can entertain herself whilst I go upstairs to talk with Autumn. I knock on the door. "Leave Winter, leave." She says. I hear her sobbing and I can't bear the fact that I made her this upset. "My sweet, please let me explain." I say.
Silence... I hear nothing but silence. I opdn the door on a crack as I sneak inside and sit behind Autumn on the bed.
"My love, I know I messed up." I start talking whilst Autumn still doesn't look at me. "I should have never brought up Shannon, I am so sorry." As I finnish that sentence Autumn turns around. Her eyes are red from crying and her make-up is all over her face. "It was just in the heat of the moment I blurted it out but I understand if you don't forgive me." I look down at the ground holding back tears as Autumn gently puts her hands under my chin and lifts my head up to look her in the eyes. "My sweet, I should have not continued wuth asking why you didn't want to tell me. I crossed your boundries and you couldn't help it." We look eachother deep in the eyes as we sut in silence. This time it is not an uncomfertable silence, its a nice one.
"My mom used to have a horse, Cheerio. I would spend all my time with him but then he had a horrible accident and he had to be put asleep. Even the thought of that still makes me shiver. He was my only friend and when I lost him I lost everything." I start explaining whilst Autumn listens to me and strokes my arm. "I fell into a big depression when I lost him and I never got over it." I pause and take a deep breath, then I continue talking. "I could never look at a horse the same after that, all I could see was the pain I felt from loosing Cheerio. I stopped riding and I have never touched a horse since the day I lost him." My eyes are filled with tears when I finnish talking and Autumn pulls me in for a hug. "My love, that sounds horrible!" She says whilst she comforts me and strokes my back. "I had no idea that that ever happened, you must have felt so alone." I cry whilst I am held in a warm embrace by Autumn and then we walk downstairs to see Ember still happiky watching tv. "If we ever get a horse, can we call it Cherry?" I ask Autumn and she giggles. "Ofcourse my love, anything for you."
-Authors note:
Yes, I did make Winter a horse man purely because I want Ember to be a horse girl.
