WHEN I ASKED WHY

( Chapter 6 )

Heyyy.

VOTE &
COMMENT

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I don't feel like going to school. I need to apologise to him. But I can't. I don't know why I just can't seem to talk to him like I talk to other people.

He's different.

I had a friend, his name was Flinn. I met him at my other friend's birthday party. He was funny and charming. He tried to kiss me at a birthday party of my cousin but I obviously I wouldn't dare kiss him. He was hay bad boy at the end of the street who only has 40 year old as friends. What do i have to do with him? They say there's always a different so De of everyone and I completely agree. As if he was a prince during day and at night he turns into a wreck less bear. My mom desided that we shouldn't be friends anymore and therefor my only friend, a lunatic was gone.

~~~~~

Few days pass and I haven't talked to Dan. I decide to ignore him and erase him completely out of my life. He saw me one time, but looked away. I don't care anymore because I definately won't be the one to apologise. But... thinking about it. I should be the one to apologise. I rejected him. I ran awaywhen he confessed his feelings. But, that's just who I am. Someone comes in my life with good intentions but I push them away.Even at the coffee shop. I don't see him anymore. I did this. I made things awkward between us. I hate to admit that I do like him but...

"What's wrong?" Sarah says pushing her glasses up.

"Nothing, I was just dreaming." I lie.

I hear her sigh. She's been a good friend, but im not too sure if i want to share my feelings with her. Shes caring and sweet but heres something shes hiding, we all do but she seems to uptight.

I turn around to open my locker and grab my English books as the bell rang. This is what happened everyday for the past two weeks. I have no emotion, come to school and pretend I'm okay.

But really.
I'm not.
I literally don't know why.

Its last period and I come out of class waiting for my mom, or the bus or someone.
Anyone, to pick me up. I immediately remember Dan. I shake my head and I walk. Two blocks away from the school I see Dan's car. I get excited, wanting him to come pick me up like last time. I smile as he drives closer. I can apologise to him, forget about what happened and move on. I wait for him. But I see Nia, the 'all-guy-type' girl siting at the passenger seat. She has long straight blonde hair, skinny with blue eyes. I see her laugh at his joke. They pass me. They didn't even see me at all. They're having fun, i should have guessed it. They have been dating for two weeks already. I'm just so dumb that I didn't notice it. No wonder.

I stand here. Alone again. I don't know what I'm feeling. I can't explain it. It's jealousy Carrie. What? N-no it's not.

"I'm not jealous." I tell myself in a whisper.

I start walking to my house. Yes, the long walk to my house. Ignoring the people that I pass. All i see is that burning image of Nia with him. I don't hate her, but I also don't like her. There's just a weird vibe when I'm with her. I don't know why. Like always. I don't know anything.

It gets darker and still walking, not caring about anyone I buy myself a red bull. Red Bull is like my alcohol it turns me Into another person and of course I'd never drink alcohol. Why would Into want to end my life earlier?

"I'm free!" I shout. "I don't care about you, you or any of you!" I say to the pedestrians and pointing at them.

"You with the funny hairstyle, I don't care about you!" I shout.

"You with your puppy." I look at the puppy. It's so cute! I do care about it. "I don't care about you but I do for the puppy! Okay!?"

"Hey Carrie! Stop it!"

"No I won't, I don't care about y-"

I look at this person who told be to stop and look at their face. It was too dark so I can't really see them.

"Oh no. Not you again! Go away Dan!" I walk away.

"Hey! Why are you doing this?"

"Can I not?" Moment of silence. "I thought so." I snap at him. I turn away but he grabs my hand and pull me to face him.

"Carrie let me take you home. You need a ride."

"Oh wow. Might as well take me to school everyday!" I say loudly.

"What happened to your girlfriend? Huh? She ran away? You took her home? She adopted a dog? What?!" I raise my voice.

"I dumped her."

I didn't speak.

"Let's not talk about this. Come on, I'll take you home." He says quickly. I obey what he says and step in the car. As usual, there's no talking. But he breaks the silence.

"I don't like her you know. She's just... not my type." He says staring at the road. I was confused by what he said.

"But she's so pretty. Blonde, tall and really good at school work, I don't get why she's not 'your type'?" I say with all honesty.

"There was no chemistry." he says. "She would talk to me, but after a while she gets distracted by her phone or her friends."

"Oh..."

"Like I said. Not my type."

"And what would your type be?" I ask looking at him.

Silence.

"We're here." He says.

"Thanks for the ride. I'll see you tomorrow but... Dan?"

"Yeah?" He answers.

"I'm sorry about.... what I said earlier, and few weeks ago. I'm really crazy. I don't know what I'm saying. I just-"

"Hey. It's cool. Forget It." He smiles.

"Oh well then, I'll see you." I step out of the car when he calls back.

"Carrie, I can take you home tomorrow if you don't have a ride. That's only if you want to."

"Alright, uh. See you then."

He drives away. Feeling relieved I step into my house and head to my room, with a smile.