WHEN I ASKED WHY

( Chapter 14 )

Here's chapter 14.

Enjoy :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I lay on my bed. Thinking. Looking at my light blue painted ceiling. I start remember childhood memories from first day at primary school to first kiss to first ever shocking news. I close my eyes, pretending i was invisible. All those memories fade to grey. I take a deep breath.

Who am I?

Invisible.

I take another deep breath, controlling my emotions. A sister. My sister.
I look at my clock at see the time.

2:04 a.m

Hailey Aku. That name swirl up in my head. It felt like a never ending storm building up. I can't stand the pain, the thought of that man. My father. A father with other children i don't know. What if he had another child somewhere? What if he's currently married to another woman.

'What ifs?' Questions fill me. I can't sleep. My eyes, they're completely awake.

He was a good man.

That specific line. That line that takes my mind in a whole different universe. How was my father a 'good' man. Guessing by the fact that she wanted to look for me and tells me she's my half sister means she has more news to say. But I couldn't bear it at that time. I wanted to go away.

My father had multiple spouses or hook ups. He hurt my family, especially my sister, Becca. He left us and always fought with my mother.

Was he really a good man?

If I could look at his face and ask him that question directly with no hint of lies. He would have said no.
He knows what he has done and he couldn't forgive himself for it.
My family was ruined because of him.
It's his fault. No one else.

Hailey Aku.

The woman who gave me the most showing news. But why me? I didn't need to know that. I don't care about that man. I don't want to do anything with that man. But why did she choose to tell me? My mother knew, but that would've been useful before but not now.

I was happy.
Someone made me happy.
He made me happy. With no other person in the world, he made me feel wanted, needed, accepted.

But not now.
Not in hours, days or months can he make me happy again.
No one can.

My father is out there. He is responsible, yet he has done nothing to fix it. My mom has taken the broken pieces and tried to fix it all up. And she has done enough.

I want to escape. I want to go away. Hide in a corner where no one can find me and where no one can destroy me.

3:13

I turn on my bed facing the wall. Blank. I close my eyes and forced myself to sleep. Steadied my breathing and relaxed.
Minutes pass and I still couldn't sleep. I decide to listen to music, music that will speak to me, music that understands.

The song begins.

Another day, of painted walls and football on the TV
No one sees me
I fade away, lost inside a memory of someone's life
It wasn't mine
I was already missing before the night I left
Just me and my shadow and all of my regrets,

Invisible - 5 seconds of summer

I listen to the words carefully, sinking the beat and rythm. Till the song ended.

~~~~~

The sound of the news awoke me. That male reporter that over reacts what's happening. I rub my eyes and head downstairs in my pajamas. I look over at our kitchen as see my mom preaparing breakfast for the first time In a long time. Confused, I head to the living room where the T.V is playing. I look to my right and on the couch, sits Becca playing with her dolls, not minding what's on the news.

I look at her, my innocent little sister.

I look back at the T.V, listening to the reporter.

"A man was found severely injured by a bomb implanted in Rose Garden City yesterday. The witness stated that she saw two men walking into the Heights building and minutes later, the building exploded. The firemen said that the bomb was placed not far from the victim and it is a miracle that he survived. The chief of police later told us his name is Eric John Sitle. He is currently at Claire Hospital. Unfortunately the police could not identify the other victim as he was tragically burnt but... "

My heart dropped. I stood incredibly still, my bones not reacting. No movement. My mouth turned dry. My head spinnig, all I could do is stand still. He is alive, he is there. I feel mom walking towards the T.V with the same expression in her body.

"H-How? He's h-here? He's injured? " I stutter.

My mom wipes a tear from her eyes and runs to the telephone, sniffing.

"Hello? Hailey? It's me Mrs. Sitle . Have you heard the news? Yeah... I know. I coming there now."

"Woah. Where are you going? " I ask her.

"I'm going to see your father. " She walks upstairs.

"Wait. So after all these years, you still love him?" I asked confused. She wanted nothing from that man and now when he's almost dying, now she wants to go to him?

"Carrie, it's not about love. It's about forgiveness."

She walks away and dresses up, then walks to her car and start driving, leaving Becca an I alone. I swtich the stove off and prepare the food for Becca. I didn't have the appetite to eat. Not since i heard my father is here and my mom is meeting him. I mean, for so many years and for the so many things he has done, she still forgives him. She still cares about him.

Eric John Sitle.

A man tragically injured.
My father.

I want to escape, someone help me?