the shade | gongfourz bnd ✓

two

Leehan is still looking at me with great anticipation. Now, how am I going to tell him that I don't give a single fuck about that president whoever girl? Can't he see that I like him? That I'm just staying silent because I'm afraid I'd ruin our relationship? Because I know it would never be the same again if I try to confess.

I've been friends with Leehan ever since we were in 10th grade. Our whole friend group formed when we were all put together in one class. Since we were all sitting in the back, causing havoc every chance we got, we were always sent to detention.

I first started realizing that I liked Leehan way back before we became friends. It was actually my first day of school when I entered, during 10th year, and there he was! Sitting in the last row, scrolling on his phone. I hadn't planned to sit in the last row because I already made a promise to myself that I would behave so I can start a new life, but fuck it, a handsome guy was sitting alone in the back, and who am I to waste the opportunity to sit beside him?

One by one, the others entered. Riwoo entered the class, dancing his way to the chair beside me, followed by Jaehyun with his jacket on, then Sungho with his neat uniform, and finally Woonhak, with his extroverted smile.

That night, I wasn't able to sleep well. All I could think about was Leehan—his stupid hair, his stupid handsome face, and his stupid presence. Of course, it's not stupid; I'm just really frustrated about my situation right now.

I stayed silent after my turn. Even after the bottle pointed at Woonhak and everyone was cheering for some hot question or dare, I just came up with a simple dare and then went back to mentally cursing them one by one.

How could they? Now they're not going to leave me alone with that Jiyo. We are really interested about each other's love lives so much that we never fail to pester each other and force into saying the truth or even shipping one of us with one particular girl. Now that they think I have a crush, they'll never let me live in peace.

My attention returned to the game when the bottle pointed at Leehan. I rolled my eyes when he chose dare because I knew Jaehyun would say something silly like kiss or hug or something flirty.

"Then can you hold eye contact with someone in our group whom you like the most?" Everyone cheered except for me. Damn that question. When will this game end?

As Leehan slowly got up with his teasing smile, I leaned back and looked up at the ceiling, trying to find an excuse to avoid watching him hold eye contact with someone else right in front of me.

But I was shocked when he squatted in front of me, looked at me with those eyes of his, and started chuckling. I chuckled nervously too. What the hell.

"Eye contact for ten seconds, okay?" Jaehyun laughed in the background, but it seemed like all the sounds around me were muffled. My only focus was on Leehan's face.

"You like me the most?" I teased him with my usual smirk. He chuckled and shook his head. "I hate you the most," he whispered, making me playfully punch his shoulder. Of course, it wouldn't be a real punch, but if it was Jaehyun, I would've punched him a long time ago.

I held my breath as I looked into his eyes. He stared at me, and I almost gasped for air when the ten seconds ended. He returned to his seat and looked at me. I raised my eyebrows at him.

"Heck, stop blushing, Taesan." I showed him my fist and acted like I was annoyed, but deep down, my heart was racing because of what he had just done.

This is why I can't move on or even stop myself from falling in love with him—because he's always like this. I'm sure for him it was just a friendly act and nothing more, but for me? It's my whole world. It's the reason I breathe, the reason I get up in the morning, the reason I'm alive-okay, maybe I'm exaggerating now. I just love him, and it's annoying when I overthink his actions as something more when, in reality, it was just a normal act for him.

Why am I so delusional? Can I stop this? How? Help me.