the shade | gongfourz bnd ✓

eighteen

Kim Leehan

I noticed Taesan's silence even after his turn ended. He seemed bothered and somehow uneasy after the game. I looked at him and suddenly... I suddenly realized something.

Maybe... this guy wasn't ready to tell me his true feelings yet. Was I too hasty? Did I rush him too much today? I suddenly felt so down as I continued staring at his bowed head. He was completely out of it. Did what happened really bother him that much?

The game went on. Our friends were trying to lift up the mood while some of them eyed me every now and then. I knew those stares were asking if we should still push the plan or not. But I couldn't even give them a single nod or shake of the head. I was just there, completely lost in it too.

Suddenly, the bottle pointed at me. Everyone looked at me. I could see Sungho nudging Jaehyun. He looked at me as if waiting for my signal, and I glanced back at Taesan.

"I'll choose truth..." I wanted to shake my head badly. I wanted to tell Jaehyun to stop our plan and just ask a normal question, but this guy is Myung Jaehyun, and he will always do whatever he wants to do.

"Then can you hold eye contact with someone in our group whom you like the most?" Everyone cheered. Damn it.

I slowly got up while shaking my head. I hid my worried expression with a smile as I made my way in front of Taesan. Maybe tonight isn't really the right time to confess. Maybe this isn't our time. So I'll just give him a hint and leave the rest to him. But I'll still wait, no matter how long it takes for him to have the courage to tell me his feelings.

I saw him leaning back and trying to look up, clearly avoiding my eyes as I sat in front of him. I chuckled at the sight. He was just too funny as he tried to look everywhere else but straight into my eyes. Then he finally looked at me, and we stared at each other.

"Eye contact for ten seconds, okay?" I heard Jaehyun in the background. But those ten seconds felt like an hour for the two of us.

"You like me the most?" he teased. I chuckled and shook my head.

"I hate you the most," I whispered, and he jokingly punched my shoulder.

"Heck, stop blushing, Taesan," I teased him as I got up, and he scoffed, showing me his fist and looking very annoyed.

After the game, I escaped the loud living room and made my way to the balcony. I didn't notice Riwoo following me. "I thought you were going to do it tonight?" he asked.

He leaned on the railing, his back facing the city lights as he turned his head to me. I heaved a sigh. The breeze was cold enough to make me shiver, but at the same time, I felt numb.

"Did you see how uncomfortable he was earlier?" I asked Riwoo, knowing he was the most observant of us. He slowly nodded.

"That was reason enough." He nodded again in understanding. "So, you're just going to stop? Because he's uncomfortable?"

"No, no. I would never give up. I just... I think I just want to give him time, you know? Enough time for him to gain confidence in himself and the guts to tell me he likes me. I mean, yeah, it's so obvious to us, but... pressuring him like that was the worst. Okay, let's say he had confessed to me during that game, but do you think I'd be happy knowing that it was out of pressure?" I was frustrated and started repeating my point. But even after that, I knew Riwoo wouldn't get it.

"I know. You don't want to pressure him. I get it. So, you're telling me that you'll wait for him until he confesses to you?" My eyes widened when Riwoo perfectly said what I had been struggling to express earlier.

"Yes."

"You're willing to wait even if it'll probably take... a long time?" I looked at him. "Of course."

"That's good. Just remember that we have your back, okay?" Riwoo tapped my shoulder before leaving me alone on the balcony. I took a deep breath to calm myself.

"I'm more than willing to wait for him," I whispered under my breath.