Sol won't as many viewers as possible, the computer program he made earlier is to alert every dam person that Sol Jackson is releasing a video, so after dinner, it's now 7:24, it's time. Jackson strip's down to his boxes, face close to the camera starts to singing one of his songs
(This is what self-destruction feels like, Marian Lin.)
After singing saying
"I'm not fighting any more, just wont to save others, that's all I ever wonted, but
I wont be a hero after this."
Shying continues
"Hello I'm Sol Jackson, yes the Suicide kid! you won't the truth, fine, site down.
I wont hold back, so dont bich about it later hmm."
Sol steps back, now viewers can see in the camp lights, his scard legs and the carved words, looking dead into the carmer continues
"My mother has abuse me for 8 years, in one way or another. Beaten and or chaind in the basement, lesson as mother puts it. Often lessons so harsh that it rendered me unconscious, food was a luxury, yes I could get my own if I wonted a beating for being fat. Nothing was said that I didn't believe, there was no help for me, no hope. She's a model, an adult and I'm a child."
Sol jesters to his leg's while saying
"I found my own resolve in life, be it lack
of life for myself."
Closing his eye's, regaining his breath, after a moment opening his eye's and saying softly
"Another Song, there the only words I have some times"
(I lost myself, Munn)
"Have you ever thought that we are human, all of us, the gays, the suicide, Della and Un-Della, all of us. No you haven't, all you see is what you wont to. Sol Jackson has everything a hero father, dead yes but model mother, a great Della. He will need for nothing, theres things money cant buy and title do shit for you"
Taking a moment to sit back down.
"It's not all great, and my 'hero' could of been a social worker. But she seen my model mother and fangirl for an hour, her only remark to me was
'Geart Della, but cold and crude attitude' , I was always talked about right infront of me, then wonder why I'm cold"
Taking a pause before continuing gravely, not looking at the carmer, but off to the side in daze
"It's so hard to be human, then we do this shit to each other, mistrust, belittle and cridasize, then say what we should be and if you don't fit in that box, it's bad, wrong, evil. Let me ask, if someone was clearly on the verge of tears, would you take the 2 seconds to ask 'are you ok', no you look and say
'Oh, if it's a problem a hero will help'.
Fucking hell! Your basically human without humanity at this point!"
Taking a breath and simply saying
"Song"
(Human,Christiana Perri)
After he continued
"My mother never won't me, before you start with the mummy issues shit, no, it's was clear early that I was a means to an end. I didn't hold it against her, I just thought this is why we have two parents. She was never right after da death, Micah, me wanting to be just like him made it worse. But I can't just watch as people get hurt, Della or Un-Della. You ever thought about that. If your favourite hero is injured it paramedics, nurse and doctors that then become his hero.
You know the big fire down on May last year, 3 people dead, why..."
Takes a deep breath
"Because people were stopping the fire fight, asking 'where's the Hero'.
Fuck 3 people dead because you won't a hero. Is this the world we live? Is this the world we wont?"
After a moment passed of Sol collecting himself, saying with a small smile
"You know how much I love my parents, my gay one's. You know why, when I lost my shit, papa, Keller didn't use some Della all he did was say 'I'm hear'
And dad, Cooper, wouldn't let me out of his reach for a month, he was just there.
My brother, told me he would never judg me. No Della just care and love"
After wiping a tear saying
"I need a break, I'll sing one of my songs, maybe should put the kids to bed, shits about to get real dark after this"
Put a pair of pants on and starts to sing
(Black Roses, Cleare Bowen)
After the song Sol takes a moment before he starts talking again
"So the roumas about me in under age party's, sex and drinking. Even the drugs, all true, I had sex at 13, started driving at almost 14 and party's following soon after.
The drugs, Uppers, to fit in as a 'normal happy teen', at Jenkins.
All mistakes, but I lost all guidelines at 7, mother would give me lessons, yes.
Those lessons offern ended with me chained in the basement, the only thing I learnt is don't trust and mother's right, allways."
Shakes his head and takes a deep breath saying
"Don't look at me and think 'poor little Sol'. No, I'm being one voice to many out there suffering, crying with no voice. Because the human race is full of closed minds that only won't to see perfection, We an't, I'm not!"
Burying his face into his hands taking a need pause before look back up and continuing in anguish
"Dont you see, we need to change, the kidnapping, the villains did nothing mother hasn't, nothing"
Chuckling continues
"I'm sitting here genuinely excited, because I left home, didn't tell my parents and took my car. I going to be ground, I've never been ground. What's it like?"
Take a moment and hmms, before saying
"I'm not saying I'm a Saint, I don't condone what has been done, but shit happens, wright or wrong, I tryed to teach my best friend a lesson, I bullied him, Do you see my hands?"
Lifting his hands up to the camera
"My friends did these, my class mates that I've keep at arms length, coldly treat and yelled at. I was to scard for people to see me, the real me. I didn't won't to risk being hurt, or worse, mother being right, that I'm a monster, a week monster."
Sol go's silent at this point, only cercarders can be heard, after a moment saying softly
"These hands stopped me thinking to try again, to end it permanently"
Sihying look at the carmer dead in the eye
"There are others out there with more issues then me, so I was changed, others have been raped. Yes I wonted to die, but other's can't even live freely."
Taking a pause then said
"I'm going to sing one more song, my therapist said they help me communicate better, find your voice and please trust someone, good night"
Then he starts singing
(You dont know, Katelyn Travis)
Unknown to Sol, his camp ground was over an hour drive from the last town.
But Sol Jackson unstage and raw live video stop the national, as soon as the first song stopped and Sol said 'I'm not fighting any more', TV stations had started airing the live video.
By the time he got to 'I won't be a hero after this', radio had Sol's live voice on air.
Everyone knew who Sol Jackson was at this point, but this, no one can say it wasn't heart breaking and eye opening, a no holdes back video.
YOU ARE READING
Hidden in the star, book one
FantasyWarning ⚠️ Depression, cutting and self carving. Talk of abuse, abusive relationship and abusive situation. Talk of captivated, changing and beating. Talk of bullying Under age sex, drinking and drug use. Talk of mental heath, PTSD and anxiety. Ta...
