i love you. 💔

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oooh crying while writing thissss
tw ; cancer, death.
i would say anywaysss but doesnt seem like i should
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age : 20
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my mom, taylor, had adopted me seven years ago. i remember the day, i had texted a wrong number, and it was her.

my parents were drug addicts and my dad was an alcoholic. cps was called and my foster parents abused me too, like damn, 2 for 2.

then, they had placed me in an orphanage. taylor had surprised me with a visit and adoption papers. i was ecstatic.

i feel lightheaded, dizzy, and weak. so i went to the doctors office. im waiting on the call to see whats up.

i moved out about a year ago, and i still visit my mom every weekend. or i try to. shes on tour and so its hard. but sometimes i go with her on tour!

*bzzbzbzzzz*

oh, my phones ringing now, finally.

„ oh, hello, is this y/n swift? "

„ yes, it is "

„ we got your results. are you driving right now? "

odd question to ask..

„ uhm, no im not "

„ alright, good, your blood test came back and i hate to inform you of this but.. you have stage 4 blood cancer. it took awhile to show, im very sorry. you dont have long to live. "

what? no, this-this isnt real, is it? no! i-im dreaming!!

„ miss swift? "

„ oh, yeah, uhm. okay. thanks for telling me. "

i hung up and stared at the wall for awhile. how could i tell my mom? this would break her. my grandmas had cancer before and it hit her bad. how will it hit her now?

i need to tell her in person. i dont know exactly how much longer i have.

i grab my keys, purse, and phone. i walk outside and into my car. taking a deep breath before heading to her house.

shes on break from tour and so shes at her road island home. i live very close. about 30 minutes. i just think about how im gonna tell her.

before i have enough time to decide on anything, i arrive. am i really here already?

i dread going inside, but i do anyway. she had always told me no matter what, be strong. so now, i have to be strong.

for her.

i knock on the door and shes delighted to see me. itll be one of the last times.

„ oh y/n! what are you doing here?! come in, i missed you!! "

i nod and walk in. i sit at the kitchen island and she gets me a cup of water.

„ mom, i have something to tell you. " i said, in a small voice

„ are you pregnant? finally!! "

i wish i was.

„ uhm.. no.. i.. i have blood cancer.. its stage four and i dont have a lot of time to live.. "

i swear i hear her heart shatter into 13 pieces. she hugs me and we cry together. she whispers 'i love you' a million times.

„ i love you so much, y/n baby.. why do you have to leave me already.. please dont forget me.. "

„ i wont. i promise. "

and i hold out my pinky, she accepts it with a small smile. tears still flowing like water through the nile.

.
.
.
.
.

the next few months consist of us hanging out all the time. i had to announce my cancer, and i found out i have about 12 left to live as im writing this.

i visit my grandma and hang out with friends and family as much as i couldve for the last days when i wasnt not in the hospital.

im cuddling with my mom watching greys anatomy. we got matching tattoos to remember our family love.

„ mom? "

„ yes, my love? "

„ please dont be sad. " i say as a tear rolls down my cheeks.

„ im sorry, hon.. i love you so so much and i hate to see you like this. please promise youll watch over me when your in heaven, dear. "

she sobs and i hold out my pinky. she accepts it and we cry. i dont wanna die. whyd it have to be me? i cant die. no. please

its already been 6 hours. so mom takes me to the hospital. i say hi to the doctors. i asked for just mom to be with me. as the doctor walks into the room, hes smiling.

whys he smiling?

„ y/n, i have amazing news. "

„ what? " my mom basically screams

„ the treatments worked. we found out a few hours ago. you are cancer free. this happens very little so you are so lucky for beating stage 4. "

„ are you serious?!? "

„ i am. congratulations. "

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a happy ending!! 😚

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