Bruised

Chapter Eleven

It's been three days since I've heard Amber's voice. There's four days until Christmas. I have tried calling Amber but she doesn't pick up.. I think we broke up. I'm really hurt about it. I love Amber and if she's breaking up with me because I gave the guy what he deserved then... I don't know.

If she's going to break up with me I just want to hear her voice one more time. I would give anything to see her.

I'm back at my house now. My black eye has gone down a lot but you can still tell that I have a black eye.

Every night when I go to bed, it's cold and empty. I don't sleep with Amber but I wish she was here. I pull off my shirt and lay in bed. I stare at the darkness of the cold, empty room. I want to wrap my arms around Amber's waist and whisper in her ear goodnight and I love her. I usually don't ever feel this way toward girls or the break ups. But I have to remind myself that Amber's not just any other girl. I turn on my stomach attempting to go to sleep.

I close my eyes and steady my breathing but my mind won't stop with thoughts of Amber. This is how it's been for the past three days. I have gotten a total of maybe nine hours of sleep the past three days. I have circles under my eyes and I have no energy. On the bright side, my dad hasn't been drinking for four days. We aren't that bad of a family that we don't have a Christmas tree up. We do and we buy gifts for each other... It's just awkward and it different without mom.

The last Christmas that she was with us I remember the things I got. I'm the only child so I got spoiled a lot, and I loved every bit of it. I had gotten a new baseball bat that I had been begging for. I also got a signed t-shirt from my favorite basketball team, the Spurs. And in a small box I had opened, I actually got tickets to see them play. I loved basketball and I still do.. I just don't play anymore. I still have the baseball bat, the signed t-shirt and even the tickets. I remember what dad had gotten mom. He bought her a ring that she had wanted since they had gotten married. It had one diamond on it and on the inside the words 'with all my heart, I love you' engraved in it. After she passed I got to keep the ring. I kept it in a special place where nobody could see it. I put it in this place in my closet where if you hit the area just right, a piece of the wall pops out. It's in the box that my dad gave it to her in.

I got up and walked to my closet and got out the ring. I held the cold metal in my hand. I observed it for awhile. After minutes of looking at it I put it back in the box and put it back in the wall.

I walk over to my bed and lay back down. I pick up my phone and called Amber one last time. She picked up on the second ring. "What?!" Her voice was cold and harsh. "Baby please.. I just.. Please baby forgive me. I was only doing it for you. I swear he won't ever do that again. Amber I love you. So much.. Just please, will you let me come see you tomorrow? Please Amber, I begging you." She was quiet. But I could still hear her breathing.

"Okay.. Fine," she said. A sigh of relief escaped my mouth. "Oh thank you so much Amber."

"Whatever, I gotta go." She spoke still harsh. "Okay good night baby, I love you." I said into the phone. She didn't say anything, just hung up. It hurt me that she didn't say she loves me back. But at least I got to hear her voice, even though it was cold and bitter.

I didn't get much sleep that night but I felt better after talking to Amber.

***

In the morning when I wake up I hurry to get ready. I can't wait to see Amber. I know she might be harsh but I just want to feel her skin again. And kiss her soft plump lips. I hurry to get there. When I knock on the door, Amber answers it. "Baby," I say. Leaning in to give her a hug. But she pulls back. "Stop calling me that!" I felt hurt by her comment. "Can't I come in?" I ask just standing at her doorway. "No, we can talk outside."