Things I Shouldn't Have Done

thirteen.

Ryker Blaze

I'm standing in the living room, hands on my hips, trying to stay calm. Father stands opposite me, in his usual position of authority, although the situation was anything but normal.

"You left her alone again, didn't you?" I asked coldly, looking him straight in the eyes.

"It's not your job to tell me what to do, Ryker. Your mother... she is no longer the woman we knew. She's crazy, my son.

Those words tore my heart apart. I felt my chest tighten and tears threatened to come to the surface.

"How can you talk about her like that? She is your wife, the mother of your children!"

"She's a burden, Ryker. And we all know that. You are not the one who has to watch it fail every day. I am the one who has to bear the burden of her illness."

I can not wait. I have to say this.

"You are the one who caused her illness!" I shouted, my voice echoing around the room.

"Your pressure, your fame... it all destroyed her!"

The father leaned forward, his eyes shining with anger.

"Don't you dare tell me how to lead my life! You have no idea what I went through with her and your brother."

A tear slid down my cheek.

"I know enough. I know you broke her. And now you hide behind your power and influence, instead of helping her. You hide it from everyone! Just so that the media and the public don't blame you, and we know very well that you are guilty!"

The father grabbed the vase and threw it against the wall, where it shattered into a thousand pieces.

"You can't blame me for everything, Ryker. She chose her own path."

"She had no choice," I whispered, my voice breaking.

"You never gave her a chance," I continue sobbing. I will always be able to cry when it comes to mom.

I looked at him once more, eyes brimming with tears, before turning and walking away.

My heart was pounding, and the pain was suffocating me. I walked fast, almost running, looking for refuge. I went into my room and slammed the door behind me.

Breathe. I have to breathe. But I can not. I want mom to get well. I want her to get better. I wish dad wasn't alive. Austin left him, and I want to too.

I just can't leave my mom. Not with him. That's why I still live here.

I can not anymore. I cry a lot and think I will suffocate in my own tears.

I take my phone out of my pocket and dial Madison's number. It rings for a few seconds but she doesn't answer.

It makes me so angry because she is never there when I need her. It's never really there for me. I have one more option left...No no. I'm done with her. I must not engage in anything that will ruin my reputation.

But now I need someone to talk to. Anyone.

So I pressed Kyla's name and put the phone to my ear.

"Ryker?" I immediately heard her worried voice on the other side.

"Ky" I said, my voice shaking.

"I can't take it anymore... I need you."

I heard her breathing, and then her voice, soft and full of compassion.

"What happened?"

"I'll tell you. Where are you?"

"With...Marcus. But I can leave...if it's important."