Little miss Cherry

Extra

 I understood better now. I was taking in all the information I just got in such a short time. Tears went down her face as she tries to hide her crying. I reached for the laptop and i closed it. I took her hands, 

~" Mareika , you should have told me. '

In my head, I was saying to myself that sure, she cheated on me, but we can work this out. She tried to say something to me, but her crying and the tears i did not understand a thing.

I was no more that confused anymore. I genuinely understood better now. It did not omit the fact that I am still hurt.

I moved closer to her. Her hands into mine. She looked at me as I moved my hands around her to hug her. I could feel her warm body against mine. I felt euphoric for a minute and then, I got back to being logical. I could feel her holding me tighter, feeling her tears going down her face on my shoulder. Her sweet perfume, giving me hope that it will get better. I put my hand on her hair, she started to sob. 

I comforted her. After five minutes later, she was calmed again, not letting go of her grip. I slowly moved from her and let go of her. We were some inches away from each other. I took her hand, and looked in her eyes,

~" Honey, that's okay. You still should have told me we would have worked it out and we still can...Mareika, it is not too late either, you should have told me...I still have a lot to process with what you just told me. I still need time to process with what you just told me...the last few months was intense, understand me, I need more time. I pardon you for all you did already, but my mind still needs time to put that topic in the classified section. We can still work it out. 

I love you"

We looked at each other in the eye. She moved closer to me, her face approaching mine...I escaped the kiss by giving her a hug instead. I needed time to figure out what to do. I still love her, that's why i married her.

We talked some more about the doctor appointment, what we can do and what we will be doing to make our relationship feel right again.

It was difficult for me to sleep beside her so soon, I was still sleeping on the couch. The next day, we book for couple counselling and therapy for both of us separately. We talked to each other again.  I told Max about it, and he wasn't really glad, told me that I should have broken up with her.

Sessions after sessions, we worked out through it. After a year,  she was getting the help she needed. I slept back in our bed but no sex. We introduced sex toys to our sex life, after a year and half. After one and a half year, therapy did wonders, I was able to sleep again with her. 

Our relationship changed. However, we still love each other. Mareika showed me that i could trust her again. We were doing it more, and by herself also. When I couldn't do, she found ways to satisfy her better.

We wanted to move after the incident. We found a nice house out of the city, and not too far away from our workplace. I stopped smoking since therapy started. We agreed on that our sex life is just part of our marriage, and that if the cravings are getting off board, that she can just get a hook up with someone and can still write on her blog to document her recovery...For now, she hasn't done it.

....