the distance of our souls

Chapter III - Friendship

    Talking to August everyday since summer started has definitely been something i enjoyed. I loved talking to her, i was in love with how her personality was. Oh gosh, she was so beautiful . I hadn't showed my face yet to her out of fear, embarrassment, and shyness.  But man, she showed her beautiful face. I mean i was in love with it!!- 'Oh i meant to say i liked it. Wait no that doesn't sound right .' What was happening?? Whatever.

Her interests very much intrigued me. She liked talking about all the shows she liked; such as my little pony, monster high, and she was obsessed with the movie coraline too. She made a few edits for all of them. mostly my little pony equistria girls in june-july. Throughout this time, i had decided to bond with her by rewatching all three and getting to know them again, since i had watched a bunch of the shows she was currently obsessed with. I was desperate to show her how much i wanted to be her friend. I remember how it all felt when we stayed up alll night long one time.

That night was my favourite part of our whole friendship so far. My favourite memory. We stayed up all night together only through text, waiting for the sunrise. We had an amazing time, i laughed all night i remember. It was scary knowing my mother could've snuck in and taken my phone any second.. But we made it!! We had a BLAST. We both ended up getting sleepy and started acting out. I went a bit coocoo, texting her random crap i don't even remember. My smile was huge all night though, but it went away when i saw the fugly sunset appear outside my window. Seeing the grey clouds made me sad.

Another memory i loved about out friendship, was how she was in love with my art. I used to draw animals often and show her, i remember drawing her acts too; Finn and Oliver! I remember how almost every week, she'd send me a new insta reel telling me she found a new animal cute and would obsess over them every time. It was something i found cute about her; 'Platonically, of course.'

August was super smart and cool. I was always impressed with how she managed to make her edits so perfectly almost every day no matter what she was going through. I loved our friendship. I loved talking to her about things i never felt like i could talk about with other's due to shyness. I definitely got quite comfortable personality wise with her. She was so sweet, she made me feel very special and validated. She always showrd me her appreciation for my help and support, even sometimes for my existence. 'Which felt strange, pfft, she's probably just really nice. There's no way she likes me, right?? No, it can't be.'

As friends, we both still used to talk about how it would be cool to meet one day to hangout together. I couldn't believe it was talking to her about that, i would've never imagined to come so far in our friendship. The idea of a real serious online friendship was a little intimidating to me, because you truly never know. 'Or do you?' Whether her life was real or not, i still wanted to do my best to make an impact on it, to make it better. I cared about August deeply. Knowing she'd been through a lot, she deserved someone to love and care about her, a real friend.

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Starting in late june however, i had finally realized i'd started developing something for this girl. 'Attachment? Could be. Maybe it's just me getting really close to her? Probably. I guess i just really care about her. Don't i? Why does this feel different than with my friends at school though? This person can literally not even be real, so why would i care about them so deeply? Why doesn't this feel like care, it feels like love. Maybe it's just a strong platonic love?Is she like a sister to me? Why do i feel like she's something different?' Everything i wondered had me really confused.

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