Hogwarts is doomed (a harry potter/helluva boss crossover)

The Embodiment of Evil

Hari woke up and was very confused. He was lying on a blanket, on the floor where he had fallen earlier. Blinking, he rubbed his eyes. Nope, what he was seeing was still there.

Everyone who he had popped to the Hotel, as well as everyone who was usually at the Hotel, were sitting around him, eating popcorn. Even Vox and Valentino were there, although they were sitting as far away from Alastor and Angel as possible. Vaggie was even closer to Charlie than usual, and the two were talking with Septimus. Pentious and Cherri were leaping up and cheering every few seconds; for what, Hari couldn't see. Velvette and Rosie were muttering together, probably plotting some unholy scheme as everyone was giving them a wide berth. Cap and Mimzy were talking, well... More like bickering furiously, but potato potahto. Husk was pouring drinks for Cap's gang while admiring the assortment of shotguns said gang had.

"What is happening?" Hari asked, to nobody in particular.

"You're awake!" Charlie grinned, darting over to hug him. She was closely followed by Vaggie, who seemed unwilling to let Charlie out of her sight for long.

"I'm starting to doubt that.. Why is everyone eating popcorn and sitting outside?"

"Oh, right! So, after you pulled that-"

"Stupid stunt?" Vaggie offered.

"Yeah, that. Oh, by the way, now your mark is on all the Sinners here because you went and made them Protected, but anyway! Then, your scary as hell devilmother put Angelic Silver in a bomb and went out to attack the Angels, turns out Angelic Silver kills Angels! Then, er- I'm not sure how to put this... Vaggie?"

"Oh thanks, leave me to explain, why don't you? I'm an Angel. Well, Fallen."

Hari blinked at her. "I knew? I didn't think it was a secret."

"YOU KNEW??" Both Charlie and Vaggie yelled.

"Obviously! You've the same colouring as an Angel, you have an untainted Angelic Spear, you have scars on your back from where your wings were ripped off.."

Charlie looked as if she thought she was stupid. "I should have figured that out sooner.."

Vaggie, however, had different concerns. "How did you see the scars?"

Hari turned slightly red. "I didn't, Niffty did.."

After the most awkward silence Hell had ever experienced, Charlie and Vaggie put on sharp smiles and continued. "Anyway! Vaggie's ex and her ex-boss found her somehow and they were going to kill her, but I jumped in the way."

"You did what! Hypocrite! Tell me off for being reckless then take a nose-dive in front of Angelic Silver!" Hari snarked, half teasing and half upset.

"Well, it was a calculated risk, because I'm Hellborn! Septimus healed me, then my Dad arrived with the other Sins and- well, look!"

Hari finally turned to see what had everyone so captivated and gasped.

Knocking Angels dead to the ground with strong strikes stood an enormous creature, twice as tall as the Tower of Lust.

The creature had the spiky Christmas-Tree body of Mammon, the wild turquoise fire-hair of Asmodeus, the six wide wings of Lucifer, the vulpine face and tail of Beezlebub, the dark cracked horns and colouring of Satan, the purple feline ears and twin tails of Belphegor, and the long, thin, needle-sharp teeth of Leviathan in demon form. The creature's eyes were simply dark pits. Adding to that, instead of arms or legs, they had seven long, thick tentacles, two for legs and five for arms. Each tentacle was a specific colour and branded with a specific sigil.

The first tentacle was the turquoise of Lust, branded with a fiery heart.

The next was the sickly yellow-green of Greed, branded with a dollar sign.

The next was the dark red of Wrath, branded with a sword.

The next was the honey-orange of Gluttony, branded with a candyfloss symbol.

The next was the blue-purple of Sloth, branded with a pillow.

The next was the dark green of Envy, branded with a crushed rose.

The last was the burnt red-purple of Pride, branded with the demonic pentagram.

Hari was in awe. "Is that Dad, the Uncles and the Aunts? Wow."

"Yep. I haven't seen it before, but this is the merged form of all Seven Sins: The Embodiment of Evil."

Hari wanted to ask about a thousand questions, but was interrupted by Cherri leaping up again and shouting "I see Adam! Full attention, everyone!" Instantly, all eyes were fixed on the gold and white masked angel flying towards the Embodiment of Evil.

"He is dead." Alastor grinned, a look of disdain in his eyes as he watched with sadistic interest.

" OATH BREAKER. LIAR. SADIST. FOOL. YOU HAVE HURT MY DAUGHTER- Our Niece- YOU HAVE CROSSED A LINE, FIRST MAN. YET WE ARE BENEVOLENT. YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS. FLY." The voices of the Sins rang out, Lucifer the loudest.

"Why are they giving him a chance?" Hari whispered.

"Oh, they're not. Adam dies tonight, that is unquestionable. But the hunt is, after all, the most enjoyable part of a kill. Seeing the fearful realisation as the prey realises they are doomed... Dad-damn it, I haven't been part of a hunt for ages. If I was allowed, I would be tearing that bitch limb from limb, quite literally. Not because he hurt me, that's why Dad and the Sins are doing it, but because he tried to kill my girlfriend." Charlie's eyes were flickering red and her voice was more confident and assertive than ever.

Vaggie had turned very red and her pupils were dilating, Hari caught her eye when Charlie looked back at the slaughter and smirked, mouthing "Whipped" at her. She smirked right back and murmured "Literally, I hope."

Hari paused for a moment, realised, and turned a similar shade of red. "TMI! She's my cousin, I don't want to think about what you two do in bed!"

"You're Asmodeus' son, you-"

"Shhh! Don't say his name, I'm trying to be inconspicuous here!"

"He's not Beetlejuice, you know"

Vaggie was proved wrong, as the Embodiment of Evil turned their head towards Hari, temporarily ignoring the already-bloody Adam.

"HARI LILI ASMODEI FIZZ POTTER-MORNINGSTAR, YOU ARE GROUNDED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, YOU LUCI-DAMNED RECKLESS FOOL, YOU COULD HAVE DIED!"

Notes:

You know how it is when you have a really good idea for a fic and then decide that it will be the one fic that you will actually plan and write in advance
and then ignore the WIP that you really need to update so Sinners can eat popcorn while watching Angel annihilation, and spend a week researching Coco Chanel instead so she can be a past member of the secret society in the new fic that isn't even set back then, it's set at the same time the books are.....

Yeah. Sorry about that.

Hope you enjoyed, only one or two more timeskips then it's Hogwarts!