Blurred Lines

Chapter 22 - Uncover

November 6, 1992

Dr. Whitney Baker's Office, Salem University Hospital

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Nobody sees, nobody knows

We are a secret, can't be exposed

That's how it is and that's how it goes

Far from the others, close to each other

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John felt sick to his stomach as he looked at Dr. Baker. His affair with Danielle was becoming something he could no longer ignore. "I got a letter at my office. From Danielle. She wanted me to go to Paris... to meet her there."

"Do you know why?" Dr. Baker asked him.

"She wasn't clear. She was actually very vague," John replied. "But there is no reason for me to see her again."

Whitney watched him closely, "Do you feel like you might have another affair?"

"Another affair?" John shook his head, "No. I think... she's worried that I might tell the ISA that she was Romulus. It was obvious she still cares about me, and she mentioned some health problems, but as I said, she didn't go into any great detail."

"Would you divulge her secret? Do you feel like her fear is founded?"

"No," he said softly, remembering his time with Danielle. "No, I wouldn't ever do that. I want Danielle to be safe. I want her to have a long life... a happy life. She deserves it. I know I loved her once."

Dr. Baker leaned forward where she sat in her chair beside him, "Did you respond to her letter?"

"I did, but I still haven't told Isabella what happened in Stockholm." John was quiet for a moment, and then he said, "I asked Danielle to stay away. I told her the truth... that I'd told Marlena about what had happened between us, but I haven't told Isabella. I'm not sure I can ever tell Isabella." John ran his hands through his hair, "I'm so confused right now. My feelings for Marlena are so complicated, and Isabella... she senses that. I'm having dreams about Doc. I'm calling out for her in my sleep... I'm reaching for her in my sleep and waking Isabella. It hurts her, and there are nightmares too... I'm recalling when Marlena was in a coma back in 1986, and what we went through with Orpheus and the ISA, and instead of trying to understand, Isabella is growing more and more distant. I can't control my dreams."

"Do you believe Isabella's distance is only because of your dreams?" she asked him. "Could it perhaps be more?"

"Maybe... I'm distant?" he said carefully. The environment at the loft had become increasingly tense. Both of them were feeling things they weren't saying. Isabella seemed to be increasingly dependent on Marcus. John felt like she was pushing him away. Her near constant badgering made it even more difficult. "I've been working later. Dinner meetings with clients, paperwork at the office... but it's because of the constant questions. The constant need she has to know where I am, who I'm talking to, how long I'm going to be gone..."

"Is there any validity to her anxiety? In situations like this there usually is," Whitney said. John gave her a wary look, and she said, "I'm not accusing you of anything, so please don't take it that way. But, is it possible that your recent reconnection with Marlena, since her accident, might be causing Isabella some fear about the stability of her relationship with you?"

John stared at his hands where his fingers laced together as he leaned forward, and he said, "It's not just possible... I know it's true, but what can I do about that?"