Headline

thirteen

troy

The funeral, New Orleans

The most difficult part of the whole Monday was watching the custom and shiny casket lower in the ground beside the sisters mother, Marva Flowers. The family respected her wishes and kept it closed casket the whole ceremony—not wanting the last image of herself lifeless to be permanently embedded in her fam brains. The last party she had that was her goodbye and for the ones that was comfortable it say to her for a sense of closure, they said it.

      The Bookers handled her death in their own way, and for the Troy, he dealt with it by staying quiet. Courtney was in attendance to be his shoulder to lean on and asking if he was okay every time he stared off into the distance. Throughout the funeral ceremony, she offered many comfort rubs and hugs as he would let her and Troy appreciated it, greatly. But he wanted to just get high. While people talked about their pasts with Ruth; sobbed, watched videos; sobbed more, and stepping up with the other grand kids to express how much she meant to them; sobbed some more, Troy just wanted to do what would numb him and forget any of it ever happened.

      But he couldn't; he had to deal with the emotions surrounding the day. The day was cloudy and humid—just what he felt. After, at the repass, the big family settled in Sasha's townhouse to eat and talk some more. Troy wasn't up for the eating and hearing more sobbing so he took time to himself to sit out on the patio under the night sky that cleared and allowed the moonlight to shine. He sat alone with Hailey on his mind—simply for the drug. Until, his uncle De came out bringing up Cara. The talk led to him finally releasing tears and getting assurance that they would be straight; but Troy didn't think he would.

      The loud laughter greeted the uncle and Troy once they head in. They follow the happiness to the sunroom and the old love song playing softly underneath the laughter. Sade. "Sister would play this shit out!" Sasha expressed referring Your Love Is King, sitting on the couch with her sister Carine. The family was focused into hearing memories of Ruth, especially the family that hadn't saw her since their move to the West coast. Troy found Courtney across the room sitting with his sister and walk over to join her. He sat, wrapping his arm around her.

      "And I mean be in the room singing her heart out, honey. Who would she be singing about, Rinny? Uh, uh.. T—" she snapped her fingers in thought, looking to her baby sister.

      "The high yella' one." Carine paused to think, "Oh, my God what was his name?"

      "Theodore Abrams." The Flowers' sisters cousin, Tunia, revealed and got a pointed finger from Sasha.

      "Yes—goddamn Theodore Abrams." Sasha said, looking to her three nephs. "Let me tell y'all something; yo' goddamn mama was so in love with that boy. Like in love. Tuni will tell you."

      "Oh yeahhh," Cousin Tunia started once Ruth's three sons and everyone look to her for the rest of the story. "She was in love with him that boy." Her accent was heavy, "Ya'know how Alfalfa was bout Darla? That was ya mama."

      "Not mama was head over heels like that," Toby said as he chuckled. "How old was she?"

      "We was six around that time," Tunia voiced. "Me and ya mama was so close."

      "That puppy love," De said.

      "But when she met y'all's Daddy.." Sasha started, shaking her head. "That was something there. She would spend hours replaying that goddamn—"

      "Miki Howard!" Sasha and Carine exclaimed in unison, laughing.

      Troy felt a warm hand grab his, looking over to find Courtney staring at him and questioning if he was all right with her eyes. He gave her a little head nod and small smile. That was only for her to let it go and put her focus back on his aunts talking. But on the inside, he was battling hard. He didn't handle his emotions well—never had that ability to—and with being a former addict and trying to maintain his sobriety, it was ten times harder to deal. The worst thing he could've ever done was found what he felt was a "cure" to his emotions.