Stop, look, listen to your heart.

Part 1

The younger years.

All of my life my grandma Mae always told me to stop, look, and listen to my heart, she was always saying stuff like that, she had lots of funny stuff to say.

Grandma and I went to church, but I sneaked out and went to Mr. Daves store and heard the words grandma would always say to me, I told him they stole my grandma's words, he told me those words are from an old song. I told him all this time I thought grandma came up with those words, he said those words are good words, later in life her sayings will help me get through this thing called life.

 I had so many people in my life growing up, like Uncle Billy, Mr. Dave the store owner, he pretends that he doesn't like me, but I know he does, and Kimmy but not so much her brother Timmy, even though my mother left me with Grandma Mae, and papa Charles when I was three, papa Charles died when I was eight, Grandma Mae always made me feel loved. By the time I was ten I found out Mr. Dave who gave me candy, was my other grandfather, I always wondered why people said I looked like his son, once I went in the back of his store and saw a picture on the desk. I heard him say what am I doing back here, he's told me time after time not to come back here, I asked him why he has a picture of me on his desk. He told me that's not me, but his boy Darnell junior, I asked him where his boy at, he told me he left a long time ago, now take my candy and get back to church before my grandma finds out I'm not there and puts the switch on me. I probably need the switch on me anyway, I'm to inquisitive, I asked what's that he said nosey, now get. And I hang around Mrs. Dave too much she doesn't even like kids, she told him don't say that, he said they've been married for two years, and she ain't gave him another son yet, he told me don't stand there listening he told me to get on out of there.

 As I was walking out, I heard young Mrs. Dave his new wife that people in the church said she's young enough to be his daughter, saying when's he going to tell me he's, my grandfather, he said because I'm not. I started thinking maybe that's why he gives me free candy, I walked down to the church, the service was still going on, I knew that because preacher is so loud and doesn't say much of nothing, if grandma heard me say that she'd correct me and say anything. If she knew I left the church she would surely use a switch on me, but not in front of anyone who knew her, she believed in using the rod and not spoiling me that's for sure.

After church I waited for her to come out, I hid the candy so she wouldn't know I went to Mr. Daves store which she told me never to go there, she didn't like me crossing the street by myself, but if what young Mrs. Dave said is true, that would say why grandma didn't want me going there.

 She came out and told the preacher the service was just fine, Charles would've liked the word he preached today, he said brother Charles is really missed, preacher looked at me and asked me how I liked the service. I said he was loud as always, and surely no one would fall asleep as loud as he was. Grandma smiled and said kids say silly things, she told preacher she'll see him next Sunday, we walked to her car a brand-new Cadillac she always kept a new car, papa Charles made sure of that, we didn't want for anything.

We got into the car, grandma said I know better than that, and she knows I don't know what the service was about sense I wasn't in church, she put her hand out and said where's the candy, and don't lie and say I don't have any. I took it out of my pocket, she went through the bag, and took out a piece, she said I know I'm not to cross the street by myself, and she told me not to go to that store. She drove off and waved at the other people coming out of church. 

 I asked her why not, she said why not what, I asked her why she doesn't want me going in that store, she said she already told me why, I said now who's lying, she pulled over and said that's why she didn't want me going to that store, with those heathens, they don't even go to church, just wait until she gets me home, she took off. When we got home, she told me to take my church suit off and put some play clothes on, and before I go in the house get a good switch, I got out of the car and Ms. Hazel our next-door neighbor asked grandma how church service was. She asked grandma that every Sunday, she told her if she came to church other than Easter and Mother's Day she wouldn't have to ask, she would know how church service was. Grandma waved at another neighbor little Tony, he watches me sometimes when grandma goes to Tuesday night church service, I always thought he's different like me, people say things about him too.