Daily Positivity

Update

Good Morning, My Fellow Kings, and Queens 

Sorry for the minor scare or worry I may have placed on your heart, however, as you can see this is an update, and like every previous update something major or at least concerning happened. That mostly revolves around my walk with Christ and how it affected me until I fell back into an old or new sin. 

For while every end is the same, the beginning is always different, and with that, I hope and pray this helps those who may have fallen into sin or feel that it has reached the point where God cannot forgive them anymore. 

Which is what I feel has occurred, considering when you have been stuck in a cycle of sin for over 10 years and finally achieve a breakthrough. It becomes quite hard to think you would fail again and return to what you left like a dog that has consumed its own vomit. 

The best representation of what has occurred for only a fool wouldn't remember the darkness he has escaped from, the death he survived fortunately, and the mercy & grace given to him by a God that loves him, which sadly isn't appreciated. And don't get me wrong, I have cried tears of joy at this victory once before, but at times I wonder just why me, O Lord? 

Why didn't you answer the prayer of death, I desperately sought and the cries I shed in my room as I shouted for you to kill a sinner and rid the world of another stain? For if I am being honest, some days I'd rather die than wake up and continue fighting. 

For that is the reality I live with... however, while one voice shouts for death another screams for life, for I have a mind that seeks death and a body that clings to life. So just what am I? 

For I feel like the wretched man, Paul spoke about and Simon who told the Lord to go away for I am a sinful man. Which is something we all feel for none of us, I mean no one is worthy of the Love, Grace, and Mercy God has shown us and the sacrifice he made, so that we all could have a chance to enter Heaven and attain eternal life with the Father, Son, and Spirit. 

So, while our sins have stained us and caused more harm than good, for some odd reason even though I feel I shouldn't be alive, God still breathes life into me. A sinful man who found the treasure he sought yet lost it due to foolishness and the appeal of death woven into life. 

A lie so sweet he had to take a bite unaware of the serpent hiding in the bushes awaiting the best time to strike. 

What I am trying to say is while our sins lead to us feeling guilt and shame for falling back into sin, rather than moving farther away from God in this time we should run towards him. For God already saw what we did and knows how we feel. 

So, it's better to go to him and lay it all out than hold onto these feelings and fall deeper into sin, for we worship a God who experienced and was tempted by the same things we were. So go to him honestly in prayer and seek a complete change of heart, along with the rest from fighting a battle you will never conquer on your own, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Mattew 11:28-29) 

So, to end it off, the best advice I have for you all is to be aware of your patterns (habits - both involuntary and voluntary), be cautious of things you do and partake in, and find a community of fellow Christians or at least believers who can hold you accountable and foster a strong relationship with God. For God has to be the number one in your life or else this won't work, and fear will eventually take over, which is why we must walk by faith and by sight and remember that "God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." (2 Timothy 1:7) 

Also, be sober and vigilant of anything and anyone that can be a hindrance to your walk with God because as we embark upon this walk with God. Early on we can make a lot of mistakes and do things that are not rooted in God due to ignorance, so to combat that read, meditate, and test the things you are doing and listening to with the word of God for it is the truth. 

And um... that is about it, so stay positive and I hope you all have a wonderful and blessed day! ❤️✌️