Difference

Chapter thirty-nine.

Aliyah Orson
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(2 weeks later)

Im woke up by rushing to the bathroom at 6 am, spewing all of the food I've ate for the past day.

I haven't got my period yet, and I'm still waiting on it. Neither did I have it last month, but maybe it's because of the birth control?

Well, I haven't taken that in a little while because I keep forgetting. But I shouldn't be pregnant? Right? Right.

Laying my head down on the toilet, I hear rustling from the bedroom and then a hand is placed on my back.

" You okay, Lemon? " His hand runs comfortingly up and down my back. I nod sighing, " Mhm..I'm fine. Just a-little sick. "

He pats my back, as I throw up once again before going to get a glass of water.

Handing me the glass, I take a sip as I lean my head on the wall. " I think I ate something bad, you just go back to bed and I'll be back in there in a little bit. "

He shakes his head, " Your sick..I'm not leaving you in here while I go back to sleep. If I go to sleep, you'll be going to sleep as well. "

I sigh tired, " Okay come on..I think I'll be fine, let's go back to bed. " He helps me up, as we make our way back into the bed.

The glass of water is sat on my nightstand, as I crawl under the warm covers and back into Blanes arms.
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Waking up at noon, the smell of breakfast peaking through the house.

Normally I'd be hungry and say it smelled good, but the smell is making me sick to my stomach. Shaking me head, I get out of bed and walk into the kitchen as I see Blane cooking.

Looking at a piece of bacon hits me like a ton of bricks, I run to the trash can and throw up literally, anything left in my stomach.

Wiping my mouth with a napkin, I sigh. " I'm going to head to the store and get something for my stomach..do you need anything? "

" Want me to run down there for you? So you don't have to get out? " He turns the stove off. Shaking my head, I grab the keys. " No..you eat and I'll be back. "

He comes over and kisses my head, " Be safe. " I smile at him, before going out to the rental we've had since we arrived.

Driving down to the store, I roll down the windows letting the fresh warm air hit me.

Parking the car, I walk in and immediately go to the medicine isle grabbing everything I need.

My eyes glance at the pregnancy test, before snatching it as well and going to the counter. The cashier scans my items, before I pay and go back to my car.

Beginning down the road, in about 5 minutes I reach back home and walk in. " I'm home! "

The tv is on, as Blane sits eating the food he made earlier. " Did you get everything you need? " I nod. " Mhm, I did. "

Walking to the bathroom, I sit the bag down and grab the pregnancy test. Do I take it? Do I throw it away? What do I do?..

Making the decision, I take the pregnancy test and then sit it down as I took a bunch of medicine for my stomach.
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Laying on the couch with Blane, I zone out looking the movie we've been watching for the past hour.

It's been hours since I took the pregnancy test and I still haven't looked at it..I'm terrified. I know I said I wanted kids, but I'm scared that I won't be a good mother.

What if my kids hate me, what if I can't provide for them, what if they grow up to never talk to me again, what if I fail as a mother?..

I know I'll never be better than my mother was, but what if I'm worse? What if I hurt my kid emotionally, by not knowing what to do?

I can't be a mother..I'm not ready. I just become a wife, and I barely know how to do that.

Would Blane leave me if I got pregnant this fast? What if he'll hate me..oh my god..he's going to leave me.

" Blane.." I already feel the tears breach my eyes, " Yes, Lemon? " I clutch his arm alittle tighter. " I'm scared. "

I've never been as scared in my life, then I am right now.." Why?.." He asks. " I bought a pregnancy test earlier and I took it..but I can't look at it. I doubt I'm pregnant but..they're no other reasons why I could be throwing up or anything right now.."

" I'm two weeks late on my period, and I'm so scared.."

Emotions come almost flying out of my mouth, as I spoke. " Lemon Baby..it's okay. There are no reasons to be scared, your going to be okay. We are going to be okay. "

I choke a cry, " But what if I am pregnant..and I'm a horrible mom? " He'd shake his head. " I know for a fact, you'll be an amazing mom..if you would've seen yourself in my eyes the first time you met all of my siblings. You wouldn't ever doubt yourself.."

" We can go see the test together, if you'd like..me and you will be okay no matter what that test says on it. "

Taking a deep breath, " Okay..let's go. " Walking towards the bathroom, felt like I was walking the plank.

It felt like I was walking somewhere that was going to change my entire life, which I was in this scenario.

If I am pregnant, me and Blane will be parents soon..and become a family. That's life-changing.

Stepping into the bathroom, I walk up to the counter at hesitantly pick up the test.

My eyes fill with tears once again, as they widen and I turn around to Blane.

" I'm pregnant. "
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