Anxiety Aspirations ||CB FanFic || Major Editing. On Hold

Prolouge

Desta Evans

I sat there, on the cold bathroom floor. Tears slowly falling down my cheeks, falling down to my hands. I sniffle softly, opening my mouth slightly as I breathe. I grasped the broken glass on the floor.

I observed myself, looking, trying to find something beautiful. Nothing. Nothing is beautiful about me.

I placed the glass on my wrist, hesitant to make an fresh wound once again.

'Just do it already, they don't care, they show it. You're not like the others. You're not beautiful' My self conscious began to take over my mind. I bit my bottom lip as it trembled. I slowly dragged the glass across my wrist.

Ahh, relief.

I watched as the blood oozed out of the wound. The tingling sensation I felt, as I let the pain take over. The bullying, the neglect. It all went away as the wound subsisted my mental pain. After sliding the broken glass across my wrist once more. I felt a bit of relief.

Thank god it's Friday.

I woke up, blinded by the sun light coming through the window. I looked at my phone and saw I had several Twitter notifications. That was quite strange being though it was 7 a.m, on an Saturday. I unlocked my phone and began reading what was said.

-> I don't know why you're still here. Just die already, you'll do us all an favor.
-> you got that right, no wonder her parents doesn't want anything to do with her.
-> She's an disgusting bitch. No one will miss you when you're gone. In fact we'll all be celebrating.

I quickly put my phone down, tears rolling down my face. Why am I so useless. This persuaded me so kill myself, kill two birds with one stone. I'll be pain free, and no one will miss me.
Instead of taking into that action, I decided to write an Poem. Poetry to me is, freedom. It takes me away from the real world. I feel like I'm living through the words, like the words are a radiation of my life.

Can you hear what I hear, see what I see?
The rainbow in the shadow, looks like pure misery.
Under the rainbow I see a little girl, she may look happy,
but her eyes are in an different world. She's crying, screaming, beginning for help. But no one can see, no one will help. Here she is, standing under the rainbow. It looks so beautiful, but a deeper meaning still shows.
Yes you're right, that little girl is me.
I have Anxiety Aspirations, you'll never be able to see.

•This is something very different from what I've been writing. But I have a great feeling about it. I hope you enjoy. Btw, the poem came from me. I made it up, as I went. I've always liked poetry but never tried it myself.
Coming Soon

#Nizzy#
XOXO