𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐬 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐔𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 { Closed }

𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰: 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃

Description Of The Story ~ The description isn't bad, but I do think it's unnecessarily long. It seems you are asking too many questions within the description, and you could have summarized it a little better.

For example, you wrote, "It's a story of a rude and alpha male, who is nearly heartless and a girl who is nearly depressed, alone and fragile."

It doesn't make sense because no one can be "nearly" depressed or "nearly" heartless. They either are or aren't. So maybe rephrase it as – "It's a story about a rude alpha male who is heartless and evil. And a girl who feels depressed, alone, and fragile."

Your next sentence also needs some fixing. You wrote, "Both didn't knew how they got fated, will they be able to give this relationship a chance, or........what when their past strikes in the present, trauma comes back again."

As you can see, that doesn't make sense. What you could write is – "They both weren't sure how they got connected, but they both knew it was fate. However, will they be able to come together? Or will their fate be broken by past traumas?

Now you could leave the description as that or add a little more and that's it. The rest of the description needs to also be worked on.

As I said in the beginning, I think your description is too long and could be overwhelming for the readers. There's nothing wrong with asking a question to get the readers intrigued, but too many questions can be off-putting.

Plot ~ Your plot is simple so far, but unique. I will say I was confused at times, and it sometimes felt rushed, but overall, not bad.

Hook ~ I decided to use the prologue as the hook for your book. I do think your hook was quite interesting from what I could understand, but I was quite confused about what exactly was going on.

Grammar ~ Within all the chapters I have read, you seem to struggle with spelling and punctuation. Within the first part of your book (Dedication and Story Info.) There are quite a few mistakes.

For one when describing the personality of the characters, you aren't actually describing their personality but their appearance.

"She has tanned skin and brown doe eyes." That is the character's appearance, not her personality. An example of someone's personality would be the "bubbly" or "nonchalant."

Secondly, there are broken sentences, and you need to work on your capitalization.

Thirdly, there are moments within a chapter where you change point of view. You sometimes go from "I" (which is first person.) To "her" (third person.) So, make sure you stick to one because it's confusing.

Descriptive ~ So I do like your dialogue amongst the characters. The way you describe how the characters act and feel is quite good! I also like the graphics you used. Brings the story to life. I also like how you switch from different languages too. Very cool.

I know English isn't your first language, but your English isn't bad! I think you should try to read over your work a little more thoroughly or get a grammar checker! Never stop writing! <3