Don't touch me // Minsung

12. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩

The afternoon had warmed up since the morning but still Jisung kept shivering, Minho's hoodie was not as hot as he had hoped it would be. However, he did not care at all anymore. The strong sea breeze blew in his hair as he followed Minho aimlessly in the town, just getting far away from the campus. Jisung needed to leave. Around him, eyes had stared too much, mouths talked too much, and brains thought too much....

Even his friends exhausted him. He knew they were going to react strongly, maybe overreact. They would surely disagree and think it normal to want to beat up the ones who hurt their friend. But Jisung did not want them to make the situation any worse than it already was. Sharing his hurtful encounters only ever ruined the mood for everyone, annoying them again with his problems.

It had taken them years to bring Jisung back to an almost normal way of living. They did not want him to suffer and go back there. Fear tensing up his body while walking to school, unable to focus on anything apart from when the bullies would meet him today, having no desire to eat or sleep, barely surviving the day...

Jisung did not want to go back at his old self, he could not bear to see his friends help him again. He had already felt like a burden for so many years. And when he saw his friends' faces decomposing as he told them about last night's attack, he only felt one emotion: shame.

How could he still need them? He was no child anymore, he had to deal with things by himself and he hated to think that they would take care of his things, baby him or try to protect him. And maybe he did not want it, but he absolutely needed it. The bullies attacked him less than 24 hours ago but he had already rewired his brain, expecting attacks were just going to happen every day now, and that he could not do anything about it.

He knew his friends would never allow that, and Minho neither. Walking alongside the younger, he only wondered what he could do to ease his pain. He had been so wrong about him. When they met, he only saw Jisung as this overly popular and smart student, and maybe he did grow a bit jealous of him. And so, when Jisung wanted to help him, Minho refused immediately, his pride hurt. He never needed anyone's pity!

However, he never imagined Jisung had suffered so much, that he had been bullied for years, and he still ignored to what extent the bullies had hurt him. But no, Jisung did not have this normal and easy life he thought he had. He was just like him, haunted by his past and held up by invisible chains, eventually unable to move forward. Except Minho was stronger than him. How could Jisung survive all this time? He understood now why the younger needed his friends so much, why he did not want to stay at his place last night: they were his everything.

And Minho needed to become his everything as well. To be his first choice if he ever needed help or someone to defend him, to be reliable. He could fight, he could protect. Yes, he had to protect him, he was the older after all. He felt responsible, and to see Jisung overthinking as they walked on and on, he could not feel more affection towards the younger.

But Jisung could not help it. Overthinking was his normal way of thinking now, and Minho knew the younger's mind was burning up right now. So, he walked in silence, leaving him all the space and peace he desperately needed.

But they passed a lot of food places and Minho knew Jisung had not eaten a lot. He grew worried about him, he did not want the younger to starve himself like him. But he could force his body to eat if that meant Jisung would eat as well.

"Do you wanna eat something?", he said as he pointed towards a little street food place.

"Why not?", the younger answered, thinking Minho would eat for the first time today. He had thought about it as well, he knew Minho had lied to him all day long about eating. He knew he starved himself. He was not too hungry, but if that meant Minho could eat, then he would gladly force himself...