Every Single Thing I Touch || HeartLiming "Moonlight Chicken"

9. ... Becomes Sick With Sadness

Saturday brought a tired Liming to an equally tired Jim preparing breakfast. As he climbed down the stairs, Liming held his breath, seeing his mother seated at the table, eating. It was close to nine, and despite wanting to sleep in, Liming had a mission today. And having some breakfast before heading out was probably the best decision anyway. He bit the insides of his cheeks, before making his way slowly towards the table.

Jim noticed the presence of his nephew and smiled, "Good morning, Liming"

Liming snapped his head back to see if his mother heard, but she was too busy. Sighing, he looked at his uncle to mirror his greeting. Liming didn't want a repetition of the previous day, especially to the expense of his uncle's deliciously prepared food too and hence, he sat at the other edge of the table—far away from his mother.

"I'm sorry about what happened that day, Ming" Jim said, placing a plate in front of the frail kid before serving him rice.

Liming looked up, confused, "It's not your fault, Lung"

Jim sighed, sitting between the mother and son, "But I should've been more careful"

"Lung" Liming leaned forward, his eyes trying not to betray how he was feeling, "Ma is... always like this, even before you came. I'm used to this, so it's not your fault"

"I'm an elder, I should've known what I was getting myself into" Jim said, leaning against his chair.

It really wasn't his uncle's fault. If anything, his uncle managed to make this house a little more livable if possible. Ever since Jim arrived, Liming has been waking up to delicious breakfasts, lunches and he never went to sleep hungry. His uncle's face lit up whenever Liming was in presence and that amount of positivity was enough for Liming to feel better for a while.

"Don't blame your mother too much, na?" Jim said, as Liming's fingers tightened around his spoon, "She's grieving"

Grieving? Everyone's excuse was grieving. Everyone hurt him because they were grieving. Heart started a hate campaign because he was grieving. North ignored his entire presence because he was grieving. His mother wished for his death because she was grieving. Everyone apparently grieved more than him, forgetting the fact that he lost his brother. He lost the biggest bond anyone could have. He felt as if he was missing his right arm the moment Night died and no one, no one cared about that. Instead, they grieved and made him the mascot to channel all their anger and hurt towards. Bonus points because he looked exactly like the person they were grieving.

He could still remember how his mother cursed at him, called him names and blamed him for his brother's death. She wanted him to die, not Night. His stomach was starting to feel full with only a couple of mouthfuls and the one thought Liming had was to run far far away.

"Ming" Jim started, reaching forward to get his attention, "I know it's not right of her to treat you like this and no matter what I say, I can't defend my sister's actions. This is unfair to you. You're the one who lived yet you look like you're dead"

A sob started to etch at the back of his throat as he looked at his uncle, "I deserve this. If only it was me—"

"No!" Jim grabbed his hand, urgently, "Don't ever say that, Liming"

"It's fine, Lung" Liming looked at him tearfully, struggling to get his hand back, "I can handle it. I can handle this much. I'm okay"

"Liming, listen, just because you are strong enough to handle the pain, doesn't mean you deserve it" His uncle's voice sounded like a whisper and that single sentence managed to break Liming's resolve.

"What should I..." Liming started, as he started sobbing openly and loudly in front of the one guardian he could rely on, "What should I do, Lung? Everyone hates me"