A HEALTHY LOVE

CH.7: PIPER & ALEX TALK (PART 2)

Two days had passed before Piper had finally messaged Alex back, promising to visit that afternoon. Meanwhile, McCullough was in the break room for breakfast and was staring at a blank transfer form for Alex. She truly tried, but it was too much for blonde CO to see Alex's face everyday and not cry. The warden had to allow the transfer, given how many scandals were already unfolding with the guards being attracted to inmates.

Once again, Alex had her nose stuck in book when CO Copeland yelled to her that she had a visitor.  In the visitation room, Alex saw Piper, who had clear apologetic expression her face. The two married girls picked up the phones slowly. "Sorry, I haven't replied to you as much. Work has been crazy lately" Piper said calmly. Alex let out a huff of emotional exhaustion as she stared at her prison wife. "Sure,Pips...work" Alex said coldly. 

Piper: "There is something you should know. Zelda asked to come with her to North Hampton. It's for a few weeks. She landed some consulting gig or something." 

Alex: "What did you tell her?"

Piper: "I haven't given her answer yet"

Alex: "Oh really? Well, that makes me feel so much better.." 

Piper: "Really?"

Alex: "No,you dumbass! Pipes, we can't keep going on like this for next three years. Either you're playing Zelda, using her while you wait for me, or you're going to eventually end up leaving me for her. Whatever you're doing right now, this game you're running with the two of us, it needs to stop. It isn't fair to either of us."

Piper: "Jesus,Alex,I know that. I know,OK? But you're the one I love. I married you, and I want to spend my life with you. It's just...you're not really in my life right now. You're in here, and she's out there. I'm someone different when I'm with Zelda than I am when I'm with you, and it's hard to walk away from that person when I come to see you. But that doesn't mean I want to walk away from us."

Alex: "I told you that you could sleep around if you wanted to because I knew that sex is just sex. With this Zelda chick,it's different. This is knowing someone else is in your heart. I can't live with that. I can't live my life knowing you're falling for her."

Piper: "I am not falling for Zelda." 

Alex: "Really? Then do you barely call me? More importantly, why don't you pick up when I call you?" 

Piper: "Alex, I love you.  You're like...a part of my body."

Alex (small tears forming her eyes): "And I love you,too, Piper...but at what cost? Both of our hearts and sanity? We've hurt each other over and over again. I'm honestly just tired of this unhealthy cycle with you and me.  I never feel like I...never have all of you. I always feel like you're pulling away."

Piper: "You're not innocent in this. You were with someone else,too."

Alex: "I did it because I was afraid that I'd lose you."

 "Really?  That's all? You're not falling for someone else,too?" Piper asked. Though Alex wanted to deny her accusing question, she couldn't verbalize it. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't bring herself to say, "No."  Instead, she shook her head and stared her prison wife silently. Alex's heart, however, whispered to her: "You feel things for that CO. You feel them when you know you shouldn't."

Piper: "Is this something we can survive?"

"Go to Northampton with Zelda. Go see what your life of real freedom could look like. When you get back,however, you have to choose,Pips. Me or her" Alex said boldly. Piper stared at her prison wife with watery eyes and put her hand on the prison glass.

"You're the one I've made a commitment to,Alex" Piper stated. Alex remembers Nicky's advice from a few days ago and decided to echo it to Piper.

"I know. Sometimes,in life, we have to know when to let go of things and people we love,Pips" Alex said, hanging up the phone and exiting the visitation area. At the same moment, McCullough had just finished filling out the transfer form for Alex and exited the break room as she started to head for the Warden's office.