When They Realized (GenMui)

23

The group gaped at the youngest Tokito, allowing the admission to become a persistent bee in their brains, a ringtone with a semblance. Their expressions, palpable, almost twisted in ways incomprehendable. A gasp, maybe a sigh, but most especially, a blink in the wrong direction. Every noise, movement, and breath was made with meaning, significant meaning derived from the spell that was cast. Muichiro's spell. He'd entranced them all with an unexpected confession.

"I'm sorry, I would've told you guys sooner, but..." His words trailed off as he began to play with his fingers, time running short. "It kinda all happened yesterday. Neither of us expected it. We just confessed one night, and that was it."

Mr. Tokito ensued a chuckle, except not one of humor but of a nervous confusion that only grew. His eyes twinkled in uncertainty, the shrill evident in his voice without him speaking. Until he did.

"Wait, I... I'm so confused," was all he managed to utter in the desperate silence of a grounded room.

It was at that suspenseful moment when Mr. Tokito began to question his consciousness, that Muichiro would come to realize his mistake.

Only days ago, Yuichiro arrived in his room, a smirk on his lips, a twinkle in his eyes as he confronted what he believed. Muichiro didn't take long to give in to Yuichiro's suspicions, revealing his pent-up feelings that he knew had to be addressed eventually. Additionally, he mentioned the benefit of coming out to their father before introducing him to his factual feelings for Genya.

He could still recall it amongst all the other things long forgotten in his mind. The way he shushed his brother, his confrontation only getting louder and louder, and the apprehension of just the mere thought of their father realizing. All of it was just so overwhelming, even in the current state of it all, when Muichiro was forced to experience it. His biggest mistake. He skipped a step—the very same step he promised his feet would land on.

"Oh, y-yeah, I'm uhh..."

Mr. Tokito's eyebrows arched in intrigue, his mouth gaping from the pull of resistant words. You could practically see his uvula as it danced around choking breaths. The situation was tangible enough to be broken evenly, a shy enough message in wandering places.

"So, you're," Mr. Tokito paused, licking his lips to briefly think up to the sky that listened. "Okay, so you're gay."

Muichiro didn't respond, the potential hitch lingering in his throat as he concentrated. On what? What could've possibly garnered his focus? The weight of a sudden revelation. It was the bonfire all over again, every chain and bolt, every whisper, lost embers in every flame. Out of all the things he couldn't recall, it was an outlier.

"I guess you two wouldn't mind heading upstairs," Mr. Tokito suggested, his voice inching louder as he assumed the subconsciousness of his eldest son. "Allow me and Muichiro to talk alone. I believe he's been hiding too many secrets from me."

The separate individuals carried their bodies and made for the floor above, their steps hesitant but understanding as they walked. Every step pulled back just a little bit before concluding its persistence. The casual steps traveled, bringing with them a signage of company. That one speck of support he believed he had, at least from his brother, was finally gone, leaving a building apprehension.

"Well, now that they're gone," Mr. Tokito began, watching silently for any change in emotion from his youngest son. "You wanna start from the top?"

Muichiro shrugged, mostly in an attempt to shake off every negative anticipation rather than to feign nonchalance. Perhaps it was too soon. However, that was the last thing he wanted to believe. The time had come, a tribulation to face.

Muichiro took a deep breath, his heart racing as he gathered the courage to speak. He could feel the weight of his father's gaze, the silence between them heavy with unspoken words. "I think it started... about three years ago," he began, his voice trembling slightly. "At first, I didn't understand it. I thought maybe it was just a phase or something that would go away. But it didn't."

He glanced up at his father, who was listening intently, his expression calm and patient. Muichiro continued, "Genya... he was the one who made me realize it. I didn't want to believe it at first, so I tried to look at girls instead. I kept telling myself that if I just found the right girl, everything would be normal. But no matter how hard I tried, it never worked. With every girl I looked at, I only found myself noticing how much more attractive their boyfriends were."

Muichiro paused, his fingers fidgeting nervously in his lap. "That's when I realized... there was no escaping it. I couldn't deny who I was anymore. But it scared me, daddy. I was terrified of what it meant, of how people would see me. And... and I didn’t want to admit that I had feelings for Genya. Well, for a short while, they went away. But this year, the feelings have come back again, and I finally decided to act upon them."

Mr. Tokito remained silent, his eyes never leaving his son. Muichiro continued, his voice growing softer, "I don't know if Genya is out, daddy. I mean, I feel terrible if he isn't because I might have just exposed him. We only started dating yesterday, after we both finally confessed how we felt. It was unexpected, but... I love him a lot."

The room was filled with a tense silence as Muichiro's words hung in the air. Mr. Tokito's face was a mixture of contemplation and concern, but there was no anger or disappointment. He took a deep breath, then slowly walked over to Muichiro. The younger Tokito flinched, closing his eyes tightly as he braced for what he feared would be a scolding.

Instead, he felt his father's hand gently take his. Muichiro's eyes shot open in surprise, meeting the warm, supportive gaze of Mr. Tokito. "Muichiro," his father began, his voice steady and filled with emotion, "I want you to know that I love you no matter what. This... this doesn't change anything between us. You're my son, and I'll always support you."

Muichiro felt a lump form in his throat, tears welling up in his eyes. He had feared this moment for so long, and now that it was here, the relief was overwhelming. "But... but what if people don’t understand? What if they judge us?"

Mr. Tokito squeezed his hand gently, shaking his head. "It doesn’t matter what others think. What matters is that you’re happy and true to yourself. People who truly care about you will support you, just like I do. And as for Genya... he’s lucky to have you. If he’s not out yet, that’s his journey, and you’ll be there for him just like I've been for you."

The words were a balm to Muichiro’s soul, soothing the anxiety that had been gnawing at him. "I’m scared, daddy," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I’m scared of what comes next."

"We’ll face it together," Mr. Tokito assured him, his voice unwavering. "You don’t have to do this alone, Muichiro. You have me, you have your brother, and you have Genya. We’ll all be here to support you every step of the way."

A tear slipped down Muichiro’s cheek, quickly followed by another. He couldn’t hold back any longer. The emotions he had kept bottled up for so long, finally breaking free. His father gently pulled him into a warm embrace, and Muichiro buried his face in his father’s chest, the tears flowing freely now.

Mr. Tokito held him close, his own eyes misting as he hummed softly, a tune he used to sing to Muichiro when he was a child. The familiar melody wrapped around them both like a comforting blanket, the world outside fading away as they found solace in each other’s presence.

They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, neither wanting to break the moment. When they finally pulled apart, Mr. Tokito cupped Muichiro’s face in his hands, wiping away the remaining tears with his thumbs. "You’re stronger than you think, Muichiro. You’ve already taken the hardest step by being honest with yourself and with me. I’m proud of you."

Muichiro nodded, the words sinking in and filling him with a sense of peace he hadn’t felt in a long time. "Thank you, daddy," he whispered, his voice full of gratitude and love.

Mr. Tokito smiled, pulling him into one last embrace. "Anytime, son. Anytime."