with all love, xoxo. (seungin, stray kids fanfic)

17 ★

..-beep beep beep beep-..

"shut up..." Seungmin mumbled, still half asleep before reaching out his hand and turning off the annoying alarm on his phone.

Mornings were always the worst part of the day, just the thought of getting out of the cozy, warm bed was making seungmin feel really uneasy. Every time he gets out of his warm bed, his body heat instantly decreases, meaning he has to wear an extra hoodie in the mornings, just walking around the house looking like a small puppy stuffed inside of a big bag.

The boy checked the time, the digits on the phone screen showing it's 8am. He still has plenty of time to get ready for his meet up with the sweet blonde boy, aka Felix. Seungmin was so excited to tell his best friend about the incident that happened with his uncle. He was also pretty nervous about it to be honest. It was exactly like how you feel when you have butterflies in your stomach, but this time it was the type of butterflies where you don't know what exactly you're feeling. There's nervousness but also excitement.

Even though he was looking forward to meeting up with Felix, there still was a part of him that wanted to stay at home for the whole day and do nothing. Or maybe not nothing, but most definitely not going outside and meeting up with other people. There's so many things he can do, for example, finally making some progress with the research about his parents. He has plenty of resources, but it's still not enough. He needs more, way more. Only if his uncle would open up to him a bit... Seungmin doesn't need to know everything all at once, just small details that could slowly lead him to the truth. He likes doing the hard work of connecting the puzzles together and making conclusions. He just needs more resources.

But of course, he can't and he won't ever get the answers from his uncle, he has to find somebody else. The old man would never tell him the truth, that's for sure. He will only keep on holding it inside of him. Seungmin doesn't even know what to expect, whether the truth is tragic or if it's even more complicated than he ever thought of.

The boy didn't feel like eating breakfast today, he just went straight to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face. The bathroom was a really strange place. On the outside it looked perfect, just like everything in the house. Seungmin's uncle's efforts paid off at some points. But this perfect look of the bathroom still doesn't fix what seungmin feels when he comes inside. He can only stare in the mirror, the reflection always making him feel so weak. He always sees the same failure standing in front of the mirror, the failure named Kim Seungmin. The boy always does everything in his power to not look in the mirror, but it's too tempting and he fails every single time.

After the usual morning hygiene, seungmin put on some clothes, not really caring about what he's wearing. Of course, he is gonna be surrounded with people judging him, they always judge. They just can't accept people who want to express themselves in a different way. Why is it so hard to just mind your own business? But the boy has different problems which are way more important than caring about how he looks at the moment.

Seungmin ran down the stairs to the main hall, when something suddenly shifted in his brain. Should he go and search for his uncle and ask him about yesterday? The man is not at work today, so he's probably gonna be busy in his office. Maybe he's a little calmer today, but there's a really small chance to that. The only moment when he's truly calm is when he's sleeping. That's the only time you can't see the angry look on his face, which is replaced by a soft expression at that time.

The thought of just barging into the office is still present in seungmin's brain, although he's trying to not think about it. That one small part of his brain just wants him to do it, to not care about the old man's reaction and just let everything out. Every emotion he's been holding in. But he can't.

With one last glance in the mirror to check his outfit, seungmin finally takes his keys and heads out of the house. He was literally so close to just confronting his uncle, but he failed, as always.

The boy still had some time left, so he decided to just sit on one of the benches near his house and listen to music. He loves music. It's like an escape from reality. Escape to your own world where you can adjust everything to your liking. A lot of people use music as an escape, which is amazing. Music is one of the things that can really mess with our emotions. It can make people closer or even turn people against each other. It can make you happy, sad, lonely, energetic or even tired. Basically everything you can imagine.

Sometimes when seungmin is outside, just zoning out and he sees people who have their headphones in, he wonders what are they listening to at the moment and tries to analyze their music taste just from their appearance. He knows it's bad to judge people just by how they look like, but he can't help it. It's like a fun game where you can't win.

Time was ticking fast and it was now time to start walking to the café. It wasn't that far, so seungmin didn't need to take the bus or anything. It was just good 20 minutes of walking. Walking is kind of annoying when it's winter and you have to deal with the snow, but it's nothing for seungmin. He doesn't mind getting his long jeans soaked from the snow.

The walk was short but also long at the same time. The only two good things about it were that seungmin didn't walk past many people and the second thing was that he was listening to music while walking, meaning the walk was faster. He was so excited to meet Felix and tell him everything that happened by the time the two best friends haven't seen each other.

Seungmin finally reached the café. He was really curious about how it's gonna look like because his best friend was always bragging about how amazing the atmosphere there is and how kind the personnel is. Well, now he's here to test that out.

With one last step, the brown haired boy finally got into the building and the first thing that literally hit him in the eyes were all the colorful paintings on the walls. The walls were painted white, a really bright white. And the paintings made the whole thing even more noticeable. Other than that, the interior looked somewhat cozy, with white tables and chairs all around the place. There were also some motivational quotes written on the chalkboard behind the counter.

It definitely looked like a place Felix would love.

Speaking of Felix, this was the moment when Seungmin's eyes finally found the blonde boy sitting on one of the white chairs in a more secluded area in the café. Seungmin mentally praised his best friend for finding this spot, because they're gonna talk about topics that no other people need to hear.

The brown haired boy finally made his way to the table, giving a quick hug to Felix. It was their usual greeting. They're often hated for it at school, because apparently it's "too gay", but it's just a simple hug isn't it? No hateful remarks are going to stop them from doing what they enjoy.

Seungmin had so much to say, that's why he started speaking even before he properly adjusted his position on the chair

"There's so many things I wanna tell you... you won't believe what happened"

Seungmin kept on talking, but that's when he noticed Felix isn't paying attention at all. He was focused on looking somewhere else. His eyes were darted on the person standing behind the counter.

Of course seungmin had to check who the person is, because who has the audacity to take Felix's attention to themselves?

The brown haired boy quickly checked the person from the corner of his eye, but he had to double check right after that. Were his own eyes betraying him or is this real?

"Why is this boy everywhere I go..?"