Ellie's pov
"I'm sorry that I hurt you. I panicked and I should have warned you but I didn't in time and now you're hurt." I blurted out after an hour of silence. We had moved on from the cafe to a restaurant for dinner. Taylor was still limping and she was topping up on painkillers when I said it.
"It's okay, honey, you didn't mean to. I only dislocated my knee and no further damage was done. It will just hurt for a day or two. Don't worry about it. I'm concerned about you though, did they even check your wrist or did you refuse?" She asked me. I looked down and shrugged, looking down at the menu.
"See anything you like?" Travis asked, changing the topic. I shook my head and pushed the menu away.
"I'm not hungry." I whispered.
Taylor shot me a look and shook her head but I ignored it and went to the bathroom. When I came back the food had been ordered so I was relieved that I didn't have to speak to the waiter. It wasn't that I wasn't hungry but I hadn't tried anything on the menu and what I had tried I didn't like. Trying new foods gets a bit scary after an eating disorder. I'm getting better at it but especially in a new place I hate it.
We sat in an uncomfortable silence while we waited and when they came over with three plates my eyes widened. I looked between them both and shook my head. "Okay before you panic, I've had it before and it's amazing. I'm not asking you to eat it if you don't want to but I am asking you to try it. I think you'll like it and if you don't Travis will finish it for you." Taylor explained.
I nodded slowly then saw our plates get put down. I looked between Taylor's plate and my own just to check that she got me the exact same as her. "Cut it up small, sweetheart. You've been doing so well
You can do it." Taylor whispered to me. She was still next to me so I felt her gently rub my back in order to make me relax. I'm used to my at home meal schedule.She took my plate and Cut up my fool before putting a small portion to one side. "You eat this tiny bit, see if you like it and if you do then you will be fine. It's just new and that is perfectly fine. Once you've had one bite you will be fine." She told me.
I took the fork and had a bite and it was actually really good. I managed half then I gave the rest to Travis. They both told me they were proud which made me smile. That smile faded when I noticed Taylor looking at my wrist. "How badly does it hurt?" She asked me.
"Four out of ten. Not bad enough to need you worrying." I replied bluntly. She decided to go quiet probably because they know not to talk to me when I feel like this after food. The more they talk the less I can tell myself to stay calm. I have such a bad temper it's unreal and it's come out of nowhere.
We hurried back to our lodge and got the fire on. They cuddled up in the corner of the sofa, Taylor on Travis' lap with her head on his shoulder. They decided on the film today so I got up to leave thinking they wanted some time alone. I was wrong. "Hey, are you getting in your pajamas? Why don't you bring back some blankets and we can get some of your comfort foods ready. I don't think you enjoyed dinner too much." Taylor told me.
I looked at her confused. "You want me to stay?" I asked, nervous. Sometimes I feel a little bit more relaxed around them and other times I feel nervous. My parents could be on and off sometimes so I am always on high alert.
"Of course we do! Get some blankets and cuddle up!" Taylor told me. She seemed excited to spend time together so I nodded slowly and walked upstairs. I took off all of my makeup and got into a hoodie and some fluffy pajamas. I also collected some blankets. When I went back downstairs all of my favorite snacks were at out on a tray And the movie was ready to go.
Taylor opened her arms but she would be a bit awkward to cuddle with since she has a hurt knee and she's also in Travis' lap. I have no idea how she expected me to cuddle up to her. Instead I sat beside Travis and lay my head on his other shoulder. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I remembered was Taylor and Travis getting up and feeling myself being lay down on the sofa.
I felt someone gently lift my head and put a pillow underneath it and when I opened my eyes Taylor had a munch of fluffy blankets in her arms. She started covering me up with them all until she saw me awake. "Hey honey, we're off to bed. Would you like to get in your bed or are you too tired to move?" Taylor asked me.
I didn't really know how to ask her for what I wanted but I just tried anyway. "Uhm. Please can you just maybe lay with me for a while. I just feel a bit uncomfortable today and I don't know why. I'm feeling so uneasy for no reason at all. I just need you to lay with me or hold me or I don't know." I rambled.
I didn't even have to ask twice. Taylor billed the blankets back and picked them up before holding out her hand for me. I probably looked like a child at that moment but I took her hand and let her take me up to bed. When I lay down she tucked me in properly then kissed my forehead. I thought she was leaving for good when she left the room but she returned in her pajamas and lay beside me. I was pulled close to her then given an option.
"You can stay with us both tonight if you want to or I'll just stay here with you." She offered. I shrugged and looked down. I just don't feel myself at all. I couldn't even make a decision.
A/N
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